09/20/2013 12:47 pm ET Updated Nov 20, 2013

iOS7 -- S.O.S.!

Note to self: Before updating any software on any device in the future, make sure to research the major changes to make sure going forward isn't going backwards.

I've used the iPhone's new iOS7 operating system for less than an hour and all I want to do is click my heels three times and shout, "There's no place like home!" I figure it's worth a shot.

Does anyone in Apple's Emerald City ever test their product updates on real consumers before unleashing them to the masses, or is it just martial law?

The home screen icons look like they were designed by a bunch of fifth graders and the new iMessage font makes a Peter Max painting look dull. Not to mention the 'photos' icon is strangely reminiscent of the NBC Peacock.

Speaking of (MS)NBC, considering all the different ways Apple tries to get your money, I wouldn't be surprised if they formed a secret partnership w/ Microsoft and in order to force-close apps now you have to buy a Windows phone and do it remotely from there.

Seriously, this is the first time I've seen Apple roll out new software that looks like a Droid. And, it shocks me. Yes, Droids are much more flexible than iPhones, and have many more user-friendly features. But the one thing I, personally, liked about the iPhone -- in all of its iterations -- were the graphics and the icons. And now they're gone and I'm left with an iPhone that looks and works like a Droid. WTF?!

Okay, maybe once I get used to it, I may find a few things better than they used to be -- which, I believe is the whole point of this thing -- but the one thing Big Brother needs to realize is they need to at least give users options when it comes to their icons/fonts, rather than force everyone to use the singular default, which looks like something your five-year-old painted and hung on your fridge.

If you want to switch back to iOS6, now's the time to do so. But, be warned; as usual, Apple will make you suffer if you choose to spit out the Kool-Aid before swallowing.