Ladies: How many times have you caught your man in some type of lie?
Go ahead and think of the number of times in your head.
Do you want to know why men eventually lie?
The answer is going to shock you:
Men lie because women don't listen.
Well, I know that probably makes your blood boil right now because you think that you listen very well. And the fact of the matter is you do.
You listen to your friends well. You listen to your children really well. You listen to your boss really well.
But when you're in a relationship with a man, you don't listen at all.
I remember telling a woman I was dating that I don't have much time to give and that I've got a lot going on in my life. From the get go, I said this. I even repeated it weekly for clarity.
Then one day I said, "Hey, I'm going through some tough times and I really need some space right now."
She acted like it came out of left field. And I reminded her that I've been pretty open since the beginning.
She just didn't listen.
Inside her mind she was thinking, "Oh, I know he says that he doesn't have much to give, but I'm going to treat him so well he's going to want a relationship. And I'll be able to get past that..."
No, as men, we really do tell you exactly what we want and who we are.
If we tell you we want to stay home and watch the football game, we don't want to hear:
"Are you going to be doing that all day long?"
We don't want you sitting next to us on the sofa, asking us when we're going to take you out to dinner that night, when we've already told you we want to sit home and watch the game.
Ladies, you've got to understand, men tell you exactly what they want and who they are. You just don't listen. So eventually they have to start lying to you in order to get you to listen.
We give you the man code; you just choose not to participate in it.
You've got to understand, we're not as complicated as you are.
Women are very complicated. You have a wide range of emotions on a daily basis. You love to express your emotions on a daily basis with your friends. You love to recap every single day what happened and have someone truly listen to you.
As a man, we speak in very short sentences. We recap things very, very quickly. And we have a lot of trouble really understanding the way you think also.
But here's the deal: If we both admire the way the opposite sex thinks, if we both admire the way the opposite sex acts, and if we really listen to one another, our relationships will be far better.
Because I don't expect you to think like a man. I don't expect you to act like a man. I admire what you are as a woman.
And as a man, we just want you to hear us. So the next time a man tells you something, listen. Listen really carefully to what he says.
If you want a further explanation of it, ask him to clarify it. In this way, you are 100% sure that you can avoid all misunderstandings in the future.
I'm on your side, ladies. I don't want you to be shocked the next time a man breaks up with you. I don't want you to be all confused and have to torture all your friends with endless conversation about why this man disappeared.
I want you to fully understand us. We say what we mean. So listen. You're not going to change us. Only we can change us.
No matter how powerful or beautiful or seductive you might be, if a man tells you something like, "I don't really think I can be in a relationship right now," then just respect that.
If you respect that and you nurture that and you allow a man that space, then you might end up in a relationship with him. And you won't be frustrated, upset, and delusional. You'll actually become more pleasant.
I've found that women who give men space and really listen to them, are women that have long, amazing relationships.
Because all guys just want that cool woman who understands them and doesn't try to change them or womanize them.
Food for thought.