THE BLOG
10/13/2014 02:44 pm ET Updated Dec 13, 2014

3 Platinum Tips From a Musician Mom

When I brought my son into the world, I was overjoyed with my growing family, but undeniably confronted by what the impact of becoming a new mother would have on my career as a professional musician. I'll never forget singing my heart out at The House of Blues in Los Angeles when I was 9 months pregnant while he danced in my belly. That moment solidified my sense of purpose and the positive effect fulfilling this purpose would have on my son. I knew there was no other choice but to pursue my passion as a professional singer, and let his presence inspire me to be both the best at my career and the best as a new mom.

As parents we want nothing but the best for our children and even though I had a supportive community, I had my doubts of how being a mom and a musician would work successfully. Yet, I believe that we do a disservice to ourselves and to our children when we bury our passions and don't pursue our dreams. I want to flourish and succeed and set an example for my children of a parent, a person, that is making the effort to live to her fullest potential, all the while loving and fulfilling the needs of their child. So how was I going to make it work?

Tip #1: Watch and learn from those around you: It is always encouraging witnessing and talking to moms who are doing it all, knowing that I am not alone and seeing happy, nurtured, flexible children who are an integral part of their parents' lives. In my case, I took my two boys with me to rehearsals for my solo band or while all of us were in the car, I learned every Minnie Ripperton song I needed to know for my gig with The Decoders on KCRW's Morning Becomes Eclectic. I watched them dance with a sea of people at Hollywood & Highland while I sang with Grammy-nominated Jose Rizo's Mongorama. They even toured with me. In addition to this profound exposure to music they also have observed their mama being a leader and creative force. Connecting with other mothers and building a strong community gave us the opportunity to support each other. I certainly have not made it happen alone nor without sacrifice.

Tip #2: Set and schedule priorities to help with time management for your new pace of life: I'm not going to say it's been easy. Sleep has definitely taken a back seat, but I believe anything is possible. I had to balance my priorities and completely manage my time differently. Once I set my goals for releasing my new EP Peek Away to the world, I had to use every second I had to slowly cross my accomplishments off my list. Finish writing the lyrics, √; book the studio, √; hire the musicians; edit the tracks; mix; master; create the artwork; hire the team; share my soul, √√; and so many √s. As much as I wanted to nap with them, my prime time to work was while they dreamt, mid day and night. Of course life happens. For instance, if my baby is sick, his health comes first and I am forced to be patient and lenient with my timelines. What kept me motivated was accepting that life's pace was transformed and acknowledging every √ was one step closer to my dreams. When their sleep cycles still weren't enough, I found another key component that helped my cause, which leads to my last tip.

The most fun tip of all, Tip #3: Incorporate creativity into everyday life: Many times I have heard my artistic friends express that they've stopped painting, stopped writing or stopped creating because they have kids, mainly because they don't have time. I find that they are saying they don't have time to create the way they always have, which I can understand. For me, I had to maintain my creative spark by improvising new outlets for this lifestyle. So I incorporated what I do with my new family. I wrote songs on the fly about eating carrots, about the small pure joys in our path and wrote songs about my hopes for him, while he slept on the beach with my guitar in my hands. This song that I wrote, recorded and produced reminds me of the strength of a mother who works towards "Nothing but the Best" for herself and hopes for "Nothing but the Best" for her child.

OFFICIAL Music Video: "Nothing but the Best (Feat. Miguel Atwood-Ferguson)" -Destani Wolf
Directed by Gabriel Noble