Like Martin Luther King, El Guapo has a dream, one that becomes particularly poignant each year around this time, a time when the jalapenos flow like the wild Rio Grande and the Corona company urges us to drink our way to cultural nirvana. As we each celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month in our own way -- whether it be via Dos Equis or Modelo- - we must accept our responsibility to reflect, with unflinching eyes, on the triumphs and tragedies of the past, including those often too-raw scars that we tend to shy away from encountering. King in his brief but impactful time urged humanity to build a more tolerant and caring tomorrow, to destroy the perceived barriers that we often build between ourselves and our fellow man, to weave a philosophy of love and understanding into the cultural landscape.
And today I take Dr. King's baton and race to confront the specter that has plagued Latinos and, in turn, mankind for decades: the unfair persecution of the Lambada. For years it has carried the undeserved label of "the forbidden dance." No dance is forbidden. This ugly blemish in U.S./Latino history has been swept under the rug for far too long. But today, in the age of twerking and sideboob, El Guapo asks us all to stand and demand justice for what paved the way for the suggestive dances we are now fortunate enough to have. The late 80s and early 90s turned a beautiful cultural dance into an obscenity, cast aside and ruthlessly forgotten like Stephen Baldwin at a family reunion. But today we say "no more." The Lambada is not the forbidden dance. Racism is the forbidden dance. Xenophobia is the forbidden dance. Hunger, despotism, and tyranny are the forbidden dance. The Lambada is not the forbidden dance.
It is time to knock down the wall, hike up our proverbial skirts, and salvage the Lambada from the landfill of history. Today, we stand together, our hips swiveling. Today, we stand together like the Kevin Bacon led youth in Footloose, and we aim to dance suggestively into the night, because this is the United States and nothing is forbidden -- except, perhaps, common sense gun regulations and moderate eating habits.
Your handsome and humble servant-