QUEER VOICES
12/25/2015 09:10 am ET Updated Dec 25, 2015

30 Of The Queerest Christmas Songs

Happy holigays!

Merry Christmas!

It seems as soon as Thanksgiving (even Halloween in some places) arrives, you can't escape holiday music -- it's pouring out of your car stereo, it's invaded every pharmacy sound system, it's everywhere! But, to our dismay, more often than not the Christmas tunes we're surrounded by are missing a certain je ne sais queer.

But fear not, friends! From a Wham! classic to a deep cut from Cher and Rosie O'Donnell (yes -- you read that correctly), we've gathered 29 of our favorite Christmas songs and all of them feature a queer twist.

So gather your family and friends, crank the volume and get festive with a little extra special something-something added to your holiday celebrations.

  • Wham!, "Last Christmas"
    In this '80s Christmas extravaganza, George Michael cozies up with some of his BFFs (but all we can think about is how many cans of mousse there must be in that cabin's bathroom).
  • RuPaul, "Nothing For Christmas"
    Christmas + incredible vintage footage of RuPaul = Very happy holidays
  • Danielle LoPresti, "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"
    A real-life couple and their adorable young son are the stars of this new take on the holiday classic. The video follows LoPresti and her partner Alicia Champion's 4-year-old son, Xander, who finds out that not everything is what it appears to be on Christmas Eve. 
  • Sam Smith, "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas"
    The megawatt pop star takes a beautifully tragic Christmas song and makes it even sadder and more beautiful.
  • Bearforce One, "Christmas Medley"
    We had no idea there was a group called Bearforce One comprised of four beefy, burly bears. Nor did we know they'd recorded a club-ready collection of Christmas classics like "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town" and "Winter Wonderland." But we feel our lives are somehow better now that we do.
  • Alaska, Courtney Act & Willam, "Dear Santa, Bring Me A Man"
    What better way to celebrate Christmas than with some of your favorite queens from "RuPaul's Drag Race"? Just look out for Willam -- she's ready to "suck all these Santas."
  • Tegan And Sara, “The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don’t Be Late)”
    The beloved lesbian twin sisters from Canada offer their whimsical take on the holidays with a cover of "The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late)."
  • Mariah Carey, "All I Want For Christmas Is You"
    Mimi gives the holidays the ultimate diva treatment in this song that's probably the closet thing we have to a contemporary Christmas classic.
  • London Gay Men's Chorus, "Coming Out At Christmas"
    The London Gay Men's Chorus's humorous take on "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing" re-casts the holiday favorite as a coming out anthem.
  • Bon Jovi, "Back Door Santa"
    With lines like "I'm your back door Santa" and "Well, I ain't like old Saint Nick, he don't come but once a year," things just got a lot racier under the mistletoe.
  • Madonna, "Santa Baby"
    The Material Girl's take on this holiday hit sounds more like a Brooklyn-ese Betty Boop than a sultry Eartha Kitt, yet it somehow still makes our Christmas playlist each year.
  • Cher And Rosie O'Donnell, "Christmas (Baby, Please Come Home)"
    As if Cher doing a club version of this Christmas favorite isn't queer enough, there's a dash of vocoded Rosie O'Donnell for extra holiday cheer.
  • Pansy Division, "Homo Christmas"
    This performance by Pansy Division on the Lavender Lounge Christmas Special features the in-your-face queer band's classic "Homo Christmas." As naughty as it is nice (you probably don't want to play this one for Grandma), it features tender lyrics like, "Don't be miserable / like Morrissey / Let me do you under / the Christmas tree..."
  • Band Aid, "Do They Know It's Christmas?"
    A queer dream team of George Michael, Boy George, Holly Johnson of Frankie Goes To Hollywood, and David Bowie join Sting, Bono, Paul McCartney and other '80s greats for the charity group's Christmas single which raised money for famine relief in Ethiopia.
  • Sharon Needles, "Jingle Bells"
    We promise you've never heard "Jingle Bells" like this version from the "Drag Race" favorite.
  • Lady Gaga, "Christmas Tree"
    Mother Monster sings "Light me up with me on top, let's falalalalalalala" and "The only place you wanna be is underneath my Christmas tree," leaving us to wonder if this is an X-mas carol or a set of XXX instructions. Either way (or both ways) -- it's campy Christmas fun.
  • The Weather Girls, "Dear Santa (Bring Me A Man This Christmas)"
    Wishing you could play "It's Raining Men" at your holiday party but worried it's not appropriate? You're in luck! This 1983 track is the Christmas equivalent of The Weather Girls' sexy, campy gay anthem.
  • Clay Aiken, "Mary, Did You Know?"
    Honey, we all knew -- and we were so excited when you figured it out, too!
  • Kylie Minogue, "Every Day's Like Christmas"
    The queer icon coos this Christmas tune as she frolics in and out of the snow with a gang of incredibly attractive pals.
  • Dolly Parton, From "A Smoky Mountain Christmas"
    A gay icon if there ever was one, Parton gets in the spirit with the help of some male back up dancers and -- and according to IMDB -- some choreography courtesy of Paula Abdul.
  • Bing Crosby And David Bowie, "The Little Drummer Boy / Peace On Earth"
    Our favorite Space Oddity teams up with Bing Crosby and all we can say is this is one beautiful Christmas combo.
  • Judy Garland, "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas"
    She may have won our hearts in arguably the most beloved fantasy film of all time, but few gay icons really lived out the emotional turmoil they sang about as much as Judy Garland. Her heartbreaking original rendition of this holiday classic, from 1944's "Meet Me In St. Louis," proves it.
  • Julie Andrews, "The Sound of Christmas"
    Dame Julie Andrews re-enacting her iconic Alpine twirl with a holiday twist. Enough said.
  • Tori Amos, "Pink And Glitter"
    Pink? Glitter? Sounds pretty gay to us...
  • Bob Rivers, "The Twelve Pains Of Christmas"
    This spirited, yet oh-so-true, parody of "The Twelve Days Of Christmas" is chock-full of not-so-subtle gay references.
  • Barbra Streisand, "I'll Be Home For Christmas"
    Simply put, Babs' golden vocals are made for the holidays.
  • Tracy Chapman, "O Holy Night"
    The lovely Tracy Chapman offers a sweet, folky version of this holiday classic.
  • kd lang, "You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch"
    During the second season of the hit musical TV show "Glee," the very un-Grinch like kd lang offered her take on the beloved Christmas classic.
  • Annie Lennox And Al Green, "Put A Little Love In Your Heart"
    Queer icon Annie Lennox teamed up with Al Green for a cover of Jackie DeShannon's "Put A Little Love In Your Heart" for the film "Scrooged."
  • Miss Richfield 1981, "Silent Night"
    Silent Night on the musical saw

    Merry Christmas!

    Posted by Miss Richfield 1981 on Wednesday, December 23, 2015
    The beloved drag queen takes on "Silent Night" with the help of a... saw.
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