We all have experiences in life, some good, some bad. Life is hard, and things don't always go as planned. During those moments you have a choice to make, you can either give into the circumstances or use those experiences as a life lesson and overcome them. Using those negative events make you a stronger person. Our life lessons are one of life's most valuable teachers, they show us ourselves, teach us about life, and show us our possibilities.
I learned this lesson the hard way when my family and I became homeless after Hurricane Irene. We found out the things that we thought would be crushing, losing our home, our children's toys and belongings, our most cherished memories, were nothing more than the material objects that held proof of our existence, yet we persevered to see another day.
Here are 5 ways life lessons present teaching moments to bring success into our lives.
1. Life Happens, And Tomorrow The Sun Still Rises
Whether it be tremendously adverse, such as a natural disaster, or just a casual, run of the mill scenario of picking up the kids after school, things happen, things occur. The tire goes flat, the furnace breaks down, the house catches fire, or someone dies, we can't control everything. What we tend to do is over dramatize those specific circumstances so that they actually overshadow whatever the current situation is. For example, getting a flat tire, I'm late for work, my boss is going to be mad at me, the report's going to be late, is all that true? In our mind it is, we actually set that up to understand and see that we won't succeed, that life has thrown us a curve ball and we're not sure if we can handle it.
How many times has this been untrue? That sense of relief washes over you, showing that the imaginary hurdle in our way was really just a speed bump.
2. You Don't Know Everything, So Shut Up
You can't always be the smartest person in the room. We deal with so many different situations and circumstances, it is truly impossible to know everything about any one given subject. As a business professional early in my career, it was always important to be the most overly communicative, as well as authoritative person in the room, and you know what? It didn't serve me long term. I had the perception that it did in my younger years, but as I reflect now, the ability to keep my mouth shut, learn, and listen are more the key factors, they are the path to enlightenment.
We can't know everything even though we may desire to, but the question is can you be intelligent enough to realize that you can and should listen.
3. Take Authority, No One Is Going To Give It To You
I don't look to others for approval. As we drift through life, some of us a little more focused than others, we tend to use the feedback from those that surround us as our barometer as to whether or not we're actually successful. Looking to those others for approval, whether it be in a professional world on a project, report or the KPI's that you have for a particular job, or personally where your wife, kids, family or friends influence how you handle certain events, means that their opinions are your reality.
"Wherever there is a man who exercises authority, there is a man who resists authority" Oscar Wilde
Be comfortable with your choices. If you're looking to others to give you validation, you're at the mercy at those others as well, lead yourself to success.
Credit: Sean Ackerman
4. Waiters Want
Putting one foot in front of the other. Yeah, everybody says it, you got to take action, you got to do something, and they are right. A small step in the right direction moves you one step further.
"The journey of a 1,000 miles begins with a single step" Lao Tzu
We tend to think everything we do has to be the most perfect, relevant thing that we execute and manifest. I was a key believer of this when I launched my podcast, everything needed to be perfect. I ended up scrapping the whole thing a week before launch, redoing it all and it wasn't perfect. I took imperfect action but I put myself out there. We must remember, the fear of failure precludes us from actually failing.
5. Small Wins Are Not Participation Trophies
Elevate every small win, knowing that success brings success. Rather than just being "celebrated" for just showing up, make sure that you feel the value in your wins.
Remember the positive comment that you received on a post or project, or the negative one that gave you feedback on how to improve. That 20 likes, versus the 2,000, 20,000 or 200,000 likes, are just as important if you make an impact on the world. Small successes build incrementally over time. We must, and I do say must make sure that each one of those small successes is celebrated. We tend to forget, and focus on our failures.
Move ahead and make sure that the life lessons, those things that you've learned, and the things that you've seen in your life are remembered as the teachers that show us path of who we can be. Reflection in our lives is something that shouldn't be done once a year, if so we miss out on the opportunities those experiences bring us. Those stories that we interact with on a daily basis can be an inspiration and the groundwork for us becoming better human beings both personally and professionally.