Ringo Writes a Song

09/24/2017 07:14 pm ET

Ringo: Hey, I’d love to sing something for our upcoming album.

Paul: You’re pretty good at drumming, Ringo.

Ringo: Aw thank you, but I'd really like to sing. Listening to you two has inspired me.

John: Thanks, Ringo. That’s nice of you.

*

Ringo: Hi there, fellow Beats! I just got back from a cruise and learned that octopuses make gardens. Isn’t that cool?

John: I hate you, Paul.

Paul: I hate you, John.

Ringo: Whoa, we're a family, remember? You know, octopi use shiny, pretty things to make beautiful homes together.

Paul: This band makes me so furious, John.

Ringo: Wouldn’t it be nice to be under the sea? In an octopus’s garden—

John: I want to leave.

*

George: Why’d you even change your name? Richard is a fine English name.

Paul: Starr just looks like a spelling error, doesn’t it?

George: Now you’re the only one of us that couldn’t be the Pope.

*

John: I love Yoko more than you, Paul. 

Paul: When did this happen?

John: Honestly, it just hit me yesterday. *leaves*

Paul: Wow. Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away.

Ringo: Totally, wish we could return to the… ocean of yesterday. You know? We would be warm below the storm, in our little hideaway beneath the waves— 

George: Hey, that should be a song.

Ringo: As a matter of fact, here are the lyrics—

George: I was talking to Paul.

*

Ringo: *runs in with a Bible* Hey! I thought about it and 'George' couldn’t be a pope name - it’s not in the Bib—

John: George, this is wonderful. ‘Here Comes the Sun’ will be a brilliant addition to the album.

Ringo: *drops Bible*

*

Paul: We’ve relented and will add ‘Octopus’s Garden’ to Abbey Road.

Ringo: Golly! Thank you! This is amazing!

John: This is the last album The Beatles will record together.

Ringo: Oh no. Because of me? Is my voice that terrible? Tell me honestly.

Paul: You’re pretty good at drumming, Ringo.

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