Advice for the New Bachelorette
By Jodi Lipper & Cerina Vincent
Dear Ali,
As you prepare to find true and everlasting love on national television, we'd like to give you some (admittedly unsolicited) advice that we hope will save you from some common Bachelor and Bachelorette pitfalls. (Now, we know the show is taped ahead of time, but just humor us, okay?) Here are our top tips to help you find love like the Hot Chick that we hope you'll prove to be throughout this season:
1)Don't Let Your LSE* (low self esteem) Get the Best of You
So many women who are looking for love constantly tell themselves that they aren't "good enough," but you were chosen by ABC to represent single women everywhere, and we really hope you'll do us proud by acting confident and bold instead of voicing your negative internal monologue on national TV.
2)Don't Let Your OWL (Overwhelmed With Life) Syndrome Wreck Your Focus
Sure, having 25 guys with unattainable six-packs vie for your attention isn't just another day at the office (plus we're sure ABC is going to throw you some sort of curveball like have Jake come back and say he made a mistake or something), but keep your eye on the prize! If you know what you want (and we really hope you do!) and stay focused, we're pretty sure you'll find it among those 25 wanna be actors and models. If you don't know what you want, how will you be able to recognize it when it proposes to you on national television? It's great to know what you don't want (a man who cheats, a man who lets his mom keep his balls, or a man who put his work first), but it's even more powerful to know exactly what it is you do want. Complete the Build-a-Boyfriend program in our book, How to Love Like a Hot Chick, to figure out what you want once and for all.
3)Trust Your Instincts
Some people criticized you for running back to your safe little cubicle the minute you thought that you might "lose" on the last season of the Bachelor, but after seeing Jake choose your nemesis Vienna, we think you were simply displaying razor sharp instincts that will serve you well this time around. Don't keep obvious losers like Wes around for so long; just trust yourself to know which guys are there for the right reasons and get rid of the ones who aren't.
4)Lose the Champagne Goggles
Ali, we know they're not serving apple juice at all of those cocktail parties. Sure, this is totally your heyday and we want you to enjoy yourself, but be wary of wearing bubbly, champagne colored glasses for the entire season. Limit the toasting (and please eat something) to ensure that you won't do something to embarrass your entire family or end up engaged to someone you've never seen sober.
5)Make it About Love
We know that this opportunity can lead to truly great things like being a contestant on Dancing With the Stars or having your entire wedding including a $12,000 gown paid for by ABC, but we really hope that you'll make the conscious decision to make your experience on The Bachelorette all about love. You have an overabundance of guys trapped in a house who are dying to meet you and date you and do G*d knows what else to you, so put your ambitions aside for a few weeks and live one moment at a time, focusing on which of the 25 guys before you will give you the love that you deserve. Good luck!