Everyone talks about love; everyone dreams about finding real love, everyone wants to feel what it's like to be loved. Thousands of movies, books, poems chant the beauty of love. The concept of love has been alive since the ancient times, and it doesn't get obsolete. Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare is no less popular these days than it was at the time of its creation, and that is more than five centuries ago. Why? Because it celebrates the beauty and tragedy of true love. And there are numerous examples like this. With all its ups and downs, disappointments and disillusions, the idea of love continues to inspire us and search for something that goes beyond mere instincts.
So, why is love so important in our lives? Why do so many artists at least once in their lifetime, devoted their work, be it a painting or a piece of writing, to the idea of love? Why do the majority of us aspire to find the real love and experience that feeling at least once during the lifetime? With so many 'why's,' I believe there is a simple answer to it: Only love can reveal our best qualities and inspire us for living a purposeful life.
Victor Frankl, a psychologist who survived concentration camp, said in his book Man's Search for Meaning: "For the first time in my life I saw the truth as it is set into song by so many poets, proclaimed as the final wisdom by so many thinkers. The truth - that Love is the ultimate and highest goal to which man can aspire." Thus, Love becomes something that has a healing power and gives sense to life, especially during hard life conditions and situations. Love is important, as it is something more of an ideal quality and can open up our hearts to having the most beautiful and transcendent experiences in life. And those experiences have the most value as they can't be simply bought. Human beings can become human only by bypassing our dependence on physical needs and reaching the state of full self-realization.
Some people might argue that love, on the contrary, can make us unhappy and depressed, especially when the feeling of love isn't mutual, and the person's expression of love gets rejected. Goethe fully revealed the downside side and consequences of not shared love in his famous novel The Sorrows of Young Werther. The main character of the story takes down his life not being able to bear the unshared feeling of love. While it's an extreme case, there are a lot of people who fully understand the feelings and sufferings of young Werther and who undergo emotional sufferings that can often lead to depression. And so, if love can cause such pain, the natural question comes: Isn't it better not to give love such power and to suppress one's natural desire of experiencing love? In the long run, maybe it's better to stay away from it, rather than go through such pain? Personally, I would answer those questions negatively.
I think it's just necessary to differentiate between true love and imagined one-way love or a distorted idea of love that can lead to such a relationship when one person manipulates the other to get what he or she wants, be it constant attention or a recognition from the other person in order to intensify one's self-esteem. It might be difficult to recognize true love, and at times one can go through a lot of mistakes before finding it. Nowadays, there are some helpful tools and articles that give hints on what is true love. Young people can also talk to older and more experienced individuals and ask them for advice. Close friends can also help as, usually, they can see the things more objectively. While everyone can make a mistake once in a while, it's important to realize that mistakes are part of our experiences and can make us stronger and more mature.
Falling in love can sometimes be risky as it means being open to the other person and the world in general, and it involves some vulnerability. But being vulnerable doesn't mean to be weak, on the contrary, in means getting open and striving to become a better personality, as true love has the greatest power to reveal our best qualities. As Elizabeth Gilbert puts it: " This is a good sign having a broken heart. It means we have tried for something."