True confessions. I'm superstitious. Not about stupid things -- I don't hold my breath when I pass a cemetery or lift up my feet crossing railroad tracks -- mostly just about the really important things. Like remembering to wish when a digital clock shows all the same numbers (11:11 being the most important of course), or wishing when I turn a necklace around, and not using wedding gifts before you actually get married, and the bride and groom not seeing each other on the wedding day. Okay, maybe we all judge what's important a little differently.
I was a superstitious bride. I'll admit it. I didn't use a single wedding gift before we got back from our honeymoon. In fact, I kept the boxes all safe and sound in our library (little did I know our house sitter would have a massive party, but that's another blog). A few friends thought I was silly, but I held firm. I knew the etiquette -- if something happened and the big day didn't come, I had to return everything. Which meant not having used it. Not that I doubted Bill would marry me, but I was positive that using the crystal or china ahead of time would somehow doom my walk down the aisle.
Also, I totally banned Bill from being anywhere near me on my wedding day. I actually kind of trapped myself with that one, but it worked out in the end. We'll be celebrating the 10th anniversary of our engagement in less than a month. I'm not sure what I thought would happen if we saw each other, but I wasn't taking that chance.
Now let me be clear -- I do not push these superstitions on my clients. If anything I shy away from showing how weird I am to those who are paying me. But I do ask each couple on the first conference call, do you want to see each other on your wedding day? And you'd be surprised at the variety of answers. Some, like me, boot his butt out of the room the night prior. Some just don't want to be seen once the finery has been donned. But whatever the case, I listen carefully after I ask the question. If EITHER the bride or the groom is superstitious about this one point, I strongly urge them to stick with tradition and have space. Just in case. It mattered to one of them, right? I heard it!
It is not uncommon for me to explain, firmly, to a client that we will absolutely implement the Plan B for inclement weather regardless of the forecast because if a rain shower comes flying over at 9pm and douses everybody, the only triage I can do at that point is to hand out snorkeling gear. This is a practical matter, true. But I'm also superstitious. If we put up the tents, it won't rain. If we don't, it's going be a hurricane in the middle of winter. I just know it. Besides, some rain on your wedding day is supposed to be lucky... I just prefer to have it during setup in the morning with a nice dry wedding reception.
There are some wedding superstitions that I don't pay any attention to at all unless a client brings it up. Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue... Ay dios mio my brides... if you're going to do this one, you should come prepared. Don't look at your wedding planner five minutes before you go down the aisle and tell her you're missing a key category. I'll loan you something, but we've had to stretch to get the blue one at the last minute. Sounds like a Maid of Honor assignment to me!
Carrying the bride over the threshold is another one I'll skip, thanks. It's supposed to have something to do with leaving the evil spirits outside. I would have broken Bill's back, but more importantly, I've seen so many late night accidents involving drunk guests and clients picking people up. The last thing a new bride and groom need on their wedding night at 2am is a trip to the emergency room because the groom slammed her into the door frame in a wobbly moment. That would suck.
I will admit that the one superstition many of my clients disregard that freaks me out is using their future married name on things before they get married. I'm serious! Do you know how many of my brides create wedding email addresses with their married names? Scares the heck out of me for some reason. I've never said a word before now, but it's the one thing I'd love to counsel them against doing. You're not even supposed to write out your new monogram and I was all freaked filling out my wedding registry with the information, but it doesn't seem to bother a lot of modern brides who are already emailing me as "Mrs. So and So." Good for them. Clearly they're less superstitious than I am. Or maybe they save it for holding their breath and lifting up their feet on road trips.
Until next time, happy wedding planning from Weddings in Vieques and Weddings in Culebra!