Here's How You Get The Closure You Deserve

There are times when you'll find yourself left wondering where your relationship is going when in fact, it's been headed downhill ages ago (You were just so blinded that you didn't notice).
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Hispanic girl holding broken heart shape
Hispanic girl holding broken heart shape

There are times when you'll find yourself left wondering where your relationship is going when in fact, it's been headed downhill ages ago (You were just so blinded that you didn't notice). Yes, you may not have been fortunate enough to know that the relationship has been over for him (because the slow fade, a.k.a. ghosting, you know), but that doesn't mean that you'll wait for him to grow balls to call it quits to your face. Even if he doesn't, you can still get the closure you deserve in your own badass way. Here's how.

1. Take it to social media.

You don't necessarily have to broadcast the details of your unfortunate love story but you can post something about how your relationship is done and that your plans only revolve around enjoying your newfound life as a single lady. Since your friends and loved-ones will likely read your status, you'll be accountable and you'll be reminded of how you've ended things yourself, how there's no turning back, and how there's no getting back together, like ever.

2. Write your heart out.

Get a clean sheet of paper and write everything you have inside your tattered soul. Write until your tears fall, until you run out of words. Then fold the paper and store it somewhere you won't remember putting it. It's not going to make you feel less broken but who cares? You'd feel so much better letting out all of the pent up bitterness and anger inside of you. Or you can write an open letter to that guy you've never gotten closure with and inspire other women who are going through the same situation as yours along the way.

3. Give in to weird rituals.

It can be anything from finishing a half-marathon while listening to all of the songs you've used to listen together or going through all the belongings he left in your apartment, burning them, and throwing the ashes in the nearest beach where you live. Just have whatever weird, crazy, but symbolic ceremony that you think you needed so you can finally say goodbye to him and the painful memories you had in the past.

4. Create new memories without him.

Go back to that coffee shop where you used to hang or that beach where you used to swim and enjoy each other's company. But this time, go there and make new memories with nobody but yourself. It may sting a bit but it will prevent you from associating things and places to him (and you'll end up reclaiming your freedom in the process).

5. Focus on getting yourself back together.

A man may have broke you but you can be whole on your own. Of course, you'd want a boyfriend again soon but that doesn't mean that you'd settle for less. Take your time so when you're ready for your forever relationship, it will finally be worth it.

6. Forgive yourself.

If you're someone who's absurdly harder to no one but yourself, this is going to be a tough challenge. But with time, your eyes will be opened and when you finally see and realize your worth, you'd be totally okay. That's even if the guy you once loved failed to see it.

7. Contact him.

The chances may be really slim but be sure to exhaust all ways of telling him goodbye (phone, email, social media accounts). Tell him you're done and you're never waiting for him, ever. Don't wait for his reply but rather remove him totally from your life by blocking him and changing your phone number.

8. Make a music video to end it all.

It's probably one of the most unique ways to call it quits but it's truly possible. Corey Wadden recently uploaded his must-watch video of him and his ex-girlfriend, who he has been with for over three years, dancing to Sia's Eye of The Needle song. Both were inspired by Marina Abramovic's The Lovers performance piece, where her and her former love, Ulay, traveled to China and walked the great wall of China, from opposing ends until they met in the middle and said their final goodbye. Corey and Jelena considered this dance to be their tabula rasa, which is latin for blank slate. It was a way for them to put to rest their past.

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