This blog contains images that are NSFW
Whore (as defined in the Oxford Dictionary).
1). A prostitute
2). A woman who has many sexual encounters
3). A person who is regarded as willing to do anything to get a particular thing
Many women have an issue with the term ‘whore’ for obvious reasons. Yet I’ve decided to reclaim the word.
It’s a word that fits. It’s a word that feels right. It’s a word that perfectly describes who I am.
It’s no different to Inga Muscio reclaiming the word ‘cunt’ in her 1998 bestseller.
Or SlutWalk reclaiming the word ‘slut’. (A movement which began in Canada, after a police officer suggested that women should stop dressing like sluts as a precaution against sexual assault).
When one reclaims something that has been used to shame them, they turn that shame into personal empowerment.
When I speak about authentic whoredom, I’m not referring to sex-workers or money transactions. Nor am I referring to the whoredom of working as a journalist, banker, actor or politician.
We’re all whores. We all bend over and metaphorically take it up the arse. We are compliant in our whoredom to achieve our desired outcome. Whether that be -- a job, wealth, societal standing or power. The world is a global whorehouse.
When I use the term whore, I’m referring to myself and myself only. I try not to use ‘labels’ when speaking about others. Each individual must determine what does or doesn’t define them.
Why have I chosen this ‘derogatory’ word to define myself?
Because people don’t use the word ‘whore’ as a compliment. They use it to demean women and assert their power.
I’ve been labelled a whore by both sexes. When I reclaim the word — it no longer has power over my life or choices.
Being an authentic whore is no easy feat. It requires a level of skill and bravery — much like mistresshood.
It requires a woman to become immune to stigma and societal judgement.
In 2017, a promiscuous woman is still perceived negatively. Our culture heavily values the mythical ‘pure’ female. Society prefers a woman who hasn’t had her pussy pounded by numerous dicks.
Women (and men) purge their feelings of powerlessness in response to promiscuity by perpetuating shame-based proprietary attitudes over the SEXUAL female body.
I pay the price EVERY SINGLE DAY for being an open and sexually honest woman. I pay the price EVERY SINGLE DAY for living authentically as a whore.
There are gatekeepers who won’t TOUCH my work because I’m considered ‘risque’ in the current paradigm.
To break through their gates would require me to tone down who I am.
And I certainly won’t be doing that.
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Vanessa de Largie is the monthly sex-columnist for Maxim Magazine. She’s also an actress, author and prolific freelance journalist.