I'm Not A Mother, But Where's My Bonus?

02/05/2017 02:42 pm ET Updated Feb 08, 2017
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Where’s my bonus?

Do you know how many marriages I’ve saved in the last decade with my mouth, pussy and anus?

The government should give me a financial bonus for my contribution to matrimonial bliss. I’m keeping marriages together all-over-the-shop and all I get in return is a drained cock.

freestocks

In Australia, women are entitled to parental leave, a newborn upfront payment and a newborn supplement.

The system is built for couples.

The system is built for women who spit spawn from their pussies.

The system is not built for a childless career-orientated woman like me.

Women are rewarded by the government and taxpayers for breeding. In 2017, society still considers childbirth to be the most AMAZING thing a woman can ever do.

I’ve always considered ‘my work’ my baby. Yet society doesn’t value creatives in the way it values mothers. We run a sloppy second in the race.

Don’t get me wrong, I have a healthy respect for mothers. My own mother had five of us and slaved away her whole life -- to assure our future was bright.

But not once did my mother expect a gold medal for the experience. It was her choice to have five kids and she got on with it -- quietly.

Motherhood has since become a fashion statement and an entry to martyrdom. Childless women are regularly made to feel less by the exclusive girls-club to which they will never belong.

Being a mother nowadays comes with privileges, particularly in the workplace.

Countless times over the last decade, my specified ‘shift requests’ on the work-roster have been rejected and gifted to a mother.

Because as a single woman with no children, my life outside of work apparently doesn’t matter.

Let’s not forget what Andrea Leadsom (Theresa May’s rival for PM) told The Times newspaper in 2016: “I feel that being a mum means you have a very real stake in the future of our country, a tangible stake.”

What outdated rubbish!

British PM - Theresa May
British PM - Theresa May

As Anne Summers stated “We might not overtly punish women who are not mothers but we have our ways of letting them know they have fallen short of the ideal.”

As a woman, it seems I’m not society’s ideal. I fall short.

Sorry.

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Vanessa de Largie is an actress, author, freelance journalist and sex-columnist.

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