Species Alert: We Want Men to Look at Women That Way

10/14/2016 10:19 am ET Updated Oct 17, 2016
Mountain Gorilla, Uganda
photo credit: Rod Waddington via photopin
Mountain Gorilla, Uganda

Let’s get one thing clear from the get go. I am not defending Donald Trump’s lewd comments. I merely want to place them in a larger context. That context is the increasingly feminized culture we live in, where anything masculine or male is automatically deemed pathological.

Trump’s comments are deeply disgusting without question. But strip away the form, i.e., inexcusable choice of words, and look at the content. A man is saying he’s attracted to beautiful women and engages in the age-old ‘chase’ to win them, which is sparked by visual stimulation.

Without all that, we wouldn’t be here as a species.

In our very confused era where women are men and men are women, the ‘chase’ can originate from either gender. For the whole of human history, however, men pursued—spread their seed far and wide—and women selected—chose the best provider and protector for a family. Historically, women were often denied the political power to exercise this choice, but it didn’t change the biological imperative. The most powerful Social Justice Warriors cannot legislate away the fact that men have gazillions of sperm, and infant girls at birth have all the eggs they will ever have.

From either the religious or evolutionary point of view, it’s all about perpetuation of the species.

Why are men drawn to more shapely (read hips) women? Could it be their survival instinct includes a childbearing detector? Some researchers think so. And how do men identify shapely women? Visually. So men looking, admiring, even ogling in the undesirable extreme, would seem to offer evolutionary advantage.

Ironically, what offers additional evolutionary advantage is men refraining from this behavior in the presence of women. They still look sometimes but generally save the ‘locker room talk’ for their buddies. Why? Because it turns women off, as well it should. When women are ‘selecting’ a mate, they tend to cross turn-offs off the list. It is in everyone’s best interest to curb the extremes of this behavior in men, and as women civilize their men (sons, brothers, and husbands), another evolutionary advantage (or divine design) emerges.

Condemnation of Trump’s words aside, the instinctive male sexual response to the female is a good thing. The bad thing is a culture that demonizes male everything, or as one writer put it, “The Earth beneath our feet is shrieking. Crying out for our attention. Trying to get us to understand the gravity of our excess competition and forcefulness. This overflow of masculine energy destroys our planet. Erodes relationships. Cripples our health. Stamps down our authenticity.”

The current thinking is that women have problems, but men are problems, and, more often than not, are the problems women have. Running a support group for men is akin to “having a support group for abusers, slave owners or the Ku Klux Klan.” Little boys are expected to sit still in school like girls; when their action-oriented brains make them more ‘difficult,’ their boyhood is pathologized and often medicated. Solutions to problems must be non-assertive, from rules against hitting back in school to sanctions and ‘diplomacy’ instead of war at all costs.

Trigger warnings and safe spaces exacerbate the masculinity-as-disease ethos. Safe spaces exist to protect the supposedly oppressed from the supposed oppressor: men, conservatives, Christians, and anyone else who honors the very real differences between men and women.

Men themselves are susceptible to pathologizing their natural impulses, as in a Washington Post article titled “Many men talk like Donald Trump in private. And only other men can stop them.” The male writer tells us, “I understand now, more than ever before, that letting them talk this way about women makes me just as sexist. By excusing their words and actions, I share some responsibility for rape, marital infidelity and other awful things that men do.”

Wow. So admiring a woman’s legs, or, yes, even her front porch, leads to rape. Talk about an overreach.

Male sexual impulses are like fire; uncontained, both are deadly but properly handled, are powerful forces for good. In 2003, Harvard sophomore Mark Zuckerberg liked the ladies. He created a popular website for comparing and voting on the attractiveness of Harvard co-eds. With time, education, and a little more maturity, Zuckerberg evolved the idea into what is today Facebook.

Wow.

Lewd, disgusting comments are lewd and disgusting, but the impulse underneath is a flame we want to keep alive. Let’s not throw the baby out with the bath water.

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