The Empowerment of Positive Feedback and the Law of Attraction

01/13/2018 09:37 am ET Updated Jan 13, 2018

Bringing the Power back to yourself.

Over the last week the majority of things that have arisen in my world that required my urgent and full attention were of a more negative or challenging nature.

If the law of attraction is correct and the areas that we give our attention to will create more of the same, then by having to attend to situations with an emphasis on the negative rather than the positive, in principle, I might potentially attract more of the same into my life.

Now of course, if something comes into our life, that requires our attention, it is appropriate and important that we respond accordingly. Disregarding something that isn’t Okay will not enable or empower us to create any form of resolution or way forwards. However, what I have noticed in the last week, is that as things arrived in my world that required my full attention, by necessity, this meant that I was investing a greater amount of energy and thought in responding to problems and challenges than in focusing on the areas of my life where everything was running smoothly.

My energetic investment was out of balance!

Anyone that knows me will know that I am a great believer in bringing the power in any situation back to ourselves, we have no power over the actions of others, but we do have power over our own choices and our own actions.

So what can we do to shift this energetic imbalance?

The first thing that I do is to listen to myself and I let myself rant!

The value of a rant is that within this venting, if we truly listen, we can discover the source of our discontent and therefore recognise the root of the problem.

Whenever we see identify problem, simply in our recognition of it, we create an opportunity to consider options to address the problem and find a resolution.

We listen, we acknowledge, we validate... and in removing all judgement of either ourselves or others, we can mindfully consider an appropriate way forwards. We can then take action. Not a Re-Action, but an action grounded in reflection and consideration channelling the energy of a rant, and the energy of discontent into a valuable and successful outcome.

This is empowerment!

Empowerment is not power over others. Our greatest sources of personal empowerment derives from an ability to sit in reflective counsel with ourselves before taking action. When we are empowered we take charge of ourselves from a position of self-responsibility.

I then look for the learning.

It is my belief that we must always look for the learning in any situation, especially at times of challenge or adversity. In looking for the learning we create an energetic shift within ourselves.

Whether something goes the way that we would like it to… or not… when we discover within it a source of learning, we have created a situation in which regardless of the outcome we are on the receiving end of something that has brought value into our lives fuelling our growth and contributing to us becoming more than we were. When truly appreciated, the validation of our learning curve will always shift us to a space of internal positivity.

Lastly, I fully embrace the Full Power of Positive Feedback.

This is an exercise that I sometimes talk about with parents if they have become stuck in a negative cycle with their children.

Sometimes life throws lots of things our way. It isn’t that we’re bad people or that we are attracting a multitude of difficulty into our lives. It is simply that sometimes life is more hectic and busy than at other times. Stuff happens! When life is like this we can feel as though we barely come up for air, and what I have noticed within families is that as parents, we can unintentionally get into a cycle of only ever giving negative feedback.

Let me explain…

Let’s say we go through a week and on Monday a child behaves badly. Of course, it is appropriate to pick them up on this. However, if on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday they behave really well, because our lives are so full and busy we don’t necessarily stop to validate and acknowledge how well they have done. If then on Friday they behave badly again, we of course give them our full attention, and appropriately so. However, if then on Saturday and Sunday all is well, and our focus is on the multitude of stuff that we ourselves are having to deal with, then the outcome is that over seven days, even though the positive days have far outweighed the negative, the only feedback that we have actually given, was focused on the negative.

This is a pattern easily changed.

Even if we are utterly exhausted and our own lives are full to the brim of things that are needing our attention, by consciously making time at the end of every day to validate the positive and acknowledge the good stuff we will reverse this imbalance.

The same principle applies within our own lives. When life is busy and hectic and a great many things require our attention, which can often happen, if we consciously prioritise a time in our day when we validate and acknowledge the good stuff... the everyday stuff... the wonderful stuff that surrounds us we begin to shift the energetic quality of our overall thinking and our overall feeling.

And even more so, if in our personal feedback to ourselves we add a recognition and an appreciation of our learning curves and our achievement in attending to all that is demanding of our energy and attention on a daily basis!

We are not in charge of the thoughts and actions of anyone else. We are however in charge of ourselves. In charge of our thoughts, our perceptions and the attitudes that we choose to take in response to any given situation. It is within our recognition and ownership of this that we discover ourselves as the source of empowerment and change within our own lives.

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