The One Kind of Happiness that is Bad for Your Career, Business, Health, Wealth, and Love (and What to Do about It)

07/11/2016 11:23 am ET Updated Jul 11, 2016
Taria Pritchett of UnleashYourFierce.com
Taria Pritchett of UnleashYourFierce.com

With just two little words, Taria Pritchett, Confidence Coach and founder of UnleashYourFierece.com, unknowingly and single-handedly changed her life. Those words were: “I’m done.” At the time, her life just wasn’t going in the direction she wanted and she knew she wanted more for herself. She was done with making excuses, settling, and holding back on doing the work needed to make different choices. It was the most important step for her because it led her to dig deeper in her life to see the root of why she was stuck. Those two words set her on a long but necessary path to not only helping herself but becoming the founder of a movement.

The more she worked on herself, the more she realized other women were going through the same thing. And the root cause of it all was a term she has now coined: Bootleg HappinessTM, the one type of joy we shouldn’t be striving for.  According to Taria, it is “the momentary happiness that comes from doing the things that don’t really make you fulfilled deep inside.”

That means eating that extra slice of cake when you know you’ve been trying to get healthier.  Or dating that guy or lady who you know isn’t the best for you.  Or staying in the job you have because it is “safe” (even though you deserve so much more). 

Taria explains that the difference between Bootleg HappinessTM and true happiness is that “it’s not as good as the real thing (even if it’s a decent knock-off) and it never really lasts.”  The problem is that Bootleg HappinessTM might feel good in the moment but will lead you right back to searching for the real thing again. Bootleg HappinessTM  is especially damaging for women entrepreneurs and professionals. Taria explains that it keeps us from going after what we deserve.  Because some women would rather keep the peace in difficult situations (like asking for a raise from their boss), they don’t use their voice nearly as much as they should. They end up getting paid less than men.

Today, Taria helps save women from the effects of Bootleg HappinessTM and shows them how to use their own “I’m done” moments to shift their life. It’s what she calls “Unleashing your fierce.” She explains, “I want women to feel confident, lovable, strong, empowered, and fulfilled without settling in their life, career, or business,” and she means it.

As the leader of the Unleash Your Fierce movement, Taria shows the link between self-confidence and how it affects the way women grow, lead and succeed. She’s outspoken about violence in schools among young girls and how that affects us as we get older. She challenges women to speak up at work or in their business to help combat the low pay rates women receive versus men. And her work addresses the messages in media that are impacting the way we feel about our looks and how we conduct ourselves in our relationships.

If you are having your own “I’m done” moment and are ready to activate your confidence, here is what Taria recommends you do.

  1. Read affirmations or devotions daily

An affirmation is a phrase beginning with “I am” that states in a positive way the result you want now phrased in the present tense. Taria explains that using them can help you start changing the story you tell yourself. For example, every morning repeat, “I am bold, fearless, and confident” or read daily devotions every day to keep you in a positive mindset. What you believe is what you become.  Taria warns that affirmations alone aren’t enough but they are the perfect way to start your journey. 

 

  1. Search for resources that lift you up mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally.

When you feel less confident or “not enough”, it usually means you’re not in alignment mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally. However, the good part is that you don’t have to struggle in these areas because plenty of men and women have come before who have cracked the code on how to get your life together. Other people’s success and failures always leave clues to what you can do to better yourself. Seek out videos, blog posts, coaches, and even quizzes to help you move forward.  Taria’s confidence quiz will help you determine “how fierce” your confidence is now and will identify your confidence type. Based on these factors, the assessment will recommend a free resource for you to use to strengthen yourself mentally and emotionally.

 

  1. Create a confidence routine

When you constantly doubt yourself, compare yourself, or think you’re not enough, that means you are not putting in enough time and energy to personally develop yourself and get to know yourself well. By creating a daily confidence ritual or routine, you will start building up your confidence which will in turn help you unleash your fierce. An example of a confidence routine would be waking up at 7:30 am every morning, saying 3 affirmations, journaling, reviewing your goals, looking over your vision board, and saying a prayer before your leave the house for work. Repetition changes your mindset which will in turn change your life.

Bootleg HappinessTM isn’t worth settling for when the real thing can take you much further in your life. And when you’ve had your own “I’m done” moment, you’ll soon realize that you are well on your way to unleashing your fierce, too. 

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