I am a physician who has practiced medicine for more than three decades. In addition to being a physician, I have been an explorer of the underpinnings of how people and cultures think, respond, react and behave. Our collective consciousness impacts us, and we impact it. This collaboration is what we have been living with since the beginning of human existence on Earth.
I feel that people’s sexual or gender preference is nobody’s business but theirs. My patients come from all walks of life and every permutation of the LGBT community. I am unable to treat any of them differently because of this. I love and care for them all the same. I personally have never understood why this is even an issue in society. In my opinion, people are people regardless of race, culture, color, gender or sexual preference. It doesn’t change who they fundamentally are. The real question I have is: Why are people shamed because of characteristics that do not “fit the norm”? Who sets the standard for what the norm is? Why is sexual preference a value judgement? This doesn’t make any sense to me.
We can and should make value judgements about certain behaviors, however, like assault, rape, violence, theft, murder... you get the picture. Using your position of power to deflect these behaviors and get away with them is an exercise that many have used throughout history. This is patriarchal behavior. It operates from the “power principle” by taking power from another, leaving emotional and physical carnage. It is time we name this for what it is. A patriarch also specializes in deflection as a means of getting away with what they are responsible for, especially when they are caught or exposed.
Exposure of the power principle is a “coming out” of sorts. Kevin Spacey has “come out” as gay, but he has also come out as a patriarch in the way he is dealing with his exposure. He allegedly used the power principle to assault a minor, but he is using the former ― “coming out” ― to deflect the latter. It appears we are collectively awakening to this patriarchal tactic of deflection and hopefully clarifying our value judgements.
We must be able and willing to see through this form of camouflage. It is all too common in our society. The fact that we are discussing this is a good thing. Sometimes controversy engenders consciousness. It shows that we are beginning to wake up and lift the curtain of illusion to look behind it.
This is a good first step in our process of transformation.
And for that I am grateful.
Need help? Visit RAINN’s National Sexual Assault Online Hotline or the National Sexual Violence Resource Center’s website.