What do people learn about life after being diagnosed with cancer? originally appeared on Quora - the knowledge sharing network where compelling questions are answered by people with unique insights.
Answer by Katherine Killoran, M.D., physician, cancer survivor, on Quora.
I found the lump. I was not looking for it, but I knew something was wrong with my breast. Over a period of several months, I noticed subtle changes in the shape of my breast. At times, it felt heavy and ached. Then a distinct lump appeared. I ignored it, at first, convinced it was a cyst and would go away. It didn't go away. I had never had a mammogram, which may seem remiss for an obstetrician-gynecologist (I'll save that discussion for another time.) Even with what turned out to be a 4.7 cm tumor, my mammogram was read as essentially normal, just dense breasts. The biopsy, done several days later, was not normal.
I thought I was healthy. I was 44 years old. I enjoy exercise. I swim, bike and run. I ski both downhill and cross country. I do pilates and yoga. I am not overweight, do not smoke, and eat a reasonably healthy diet. And yet, despite all that, in February of 2013, I was diagnosed with breast cancer.
How could this happen? I certainly never expected it would happen to me. But it did. Of course, I will always wish that it had never happened to me, but my life is better now because of it. I learned to live and enjoy life now, with what I've got, not what I hope to have or achieve in the future.
I learned that although my lifestyle was mostly healthy, there were and still are things that I can do better. And, as the healthy behaviors in my life increase, I feel better, I am happier, and I am preventing a cancer recurrence. How great is that?
I feel lucky because I like to exercise, and I like to cook. A nutritious diet and regular exercise are what most often comes to mind when you consider the term healthy. I thought my diet was healthy (with an occasional indulgence), but when I looked at it, I realized I ate a lot of meat and dairy, some fruits and vegetables but probably not enough. I am not a vegetarian or vegan yet. I still eat meat, eggs and dairy, but I am conscious of how much. Instead, I make plants the focus of my diet with lean meat or fish as a complement. I intend to continue reducing the amount of meat and dairy in my diet because the less I eat, the less I want, and the better I feel.
I considered the other aspects of my lifestyle. In hindsight the biggest mistake I made is obvious. It was unrelenting stress, anxiety and lack of sleep. Being an OB/GYN is as challenging as it is rewarding -- and stressful. I worked hard to become a doctor and then an OB/GYN, and I loved my job. Or at least, I did at first. But at the time of my diagnosis, I was miserable, yet I didn't know how dramatically it was affecting my health. I knew I was sick all the time with colds, bronchitis, pneumonia and an ear infection that resulted in a ruptured ear drum and permanent hearing loss. But, I kept at it--going back day after day until the day I was diagnosed with cancer.
That was the day I finally stopped working and never went back. To make my own health a priority, I had to stop taking care of other people. Within a week, I felt better, I was sleeping better, people thought I looked younger, and this is after a cancer diagnosis. Once I had removed myself from my work environment, I could see how dramatic the health effects of stress and anxiety were. I could kick myself for being so stupid. I wish there were someway I could have appreciated what was happening to me before it was too late. Instead, I learned to be mindful. I know, I know I'm sick of all the mindful stuff too. But it's true.
My cancer diagnosis taught me how to live a healthier, happier life. Or, it was the catalyst I needed to look at my lifestyle, make necessary changes, and I am now healthier and happier because of it. I learned that sometimes healthy change can be hard, sometimes it's not as hard as you think, but the benefits of feeling well, enjoying life and preventing cancer recurrence are worth it.