And we wait.
We wait for an answer.
We wait for a miracle.
We wait for the waters to be parted and for the mountains to move.
As we are trying to process the hundreds of emotions that come with finding out we are pregnant, why is it that all too often, and all too soon, so many of us are struck with such fear and anxiety over sadly the most common burdens we face - the uneasiness of money and time. The sheer panic that takes a tight hold of us, making us question how we are going to pay for this sweet baby on their way.
Not for lack of working hard, no. But because we are just making ends meet now. And then the slew of questions come. Can you even afford another baby? How are you going to do this? You already work so much as it is; you're not even going to get time with your newborn, let alone raise him/her. How are you going to...well, do this?
Yes, sadly all too often, as we are given the news of one of the greatest blessings that could be bestowed upon us, it's followed by the incessant questions from others that begin to take over our own thoughts, almost ripping the joy out right from our hearts.
As we continue throughout our pregnancy, our belly grows as the unthinkable occurs - we are growing a human inside of us. A miracle is in the works - our baby is on their way. Our baby bump is surely growing and then begin the sweetest kicks one could ever feel. Until you've experienced it yourself, there are no words to truly describe to another what this feels like. Life is inside of us, reminding us every single day that he/she is on their way.
As we begin to gather and prepare everything for this anticipated arrival, we also begin to prepare for what is the inevitable for millions of parents - the day we must leave our baby. The day we hand part of ourselves over. The day that we will have to somehow muster up the inhuman strength to surrender a piece of our self, let go, and walk away.
At one point or another, we all will have to separate from our baby, no matter what age they are. That being said, some parents are forced to do this in an unfathomable amount of time. When we look at an average leave being 6-12 weeks of unpaid leave in the United States, for many, that would be a gift.
Mothers and fathers are resignedly passing over their "x" days old newborn; yes, days old.
The first several weeks and months of an infant's life they are learning. They are learning to open and close their big, bright eyes, lift their tiny hands, grasp with their fingertips, and lift their perfect, wobbly heads. They are learning the smells and touch of the ones who are their caretakers, the ones who are essentially keeping this fragile and helpless baby alive.
They are learning how to suck, how to use their lungs, how to kick their legs up and down. They are learning what it feels like to be swaddled, what it feels like to be nuzzled, what it feels like to be soothed when they're upset, what it feels like to be caressed as they lay asleep.
And all of these joys are all too often robbed of our parents' hands. Why?
For fear of losing our jobs.
For fear of not being able to put food on the table.
For fear of not being able to pay the rent.
For fear of having the hot water and electricity shut off.
Yes, this fear is very real.
How would I know this? Because I've experienced it first-hand.
I know what it's like to have to dip into my babies' piggy banks to get groceries for the week. I know what it's like to be on your knees, praying to God that the utilities don't get turned off as the last few notices in the mail have stated they would. I know what it's like to lay awake at night as tears stream down your face, not knowing if we would be in our home the following month, and if we were, how it was going to get paid for.
I know what it's like to struggle, and worry, and lose out on what is supposed to be one of the most joyful times in our entire lives because despite being the most powerful country in the world, we overlook one of the most empowering times in a human being's life.
I know what it's like to work numerous jobs at once, trying to show my children that they shouldn't expect anything to be handed to them, but yet still so many times, I've come up short.
I know what it's like to pass over a newborn, not even being able to see clearly passed the ocean of tears that have flooded my eyes. I know what it's like to walk out the door and have a pain that I will never fully be able to explain - to anyone. God is the only one that will ever know the true aching myself and millions of others have experienced, both physically and emotionally.
Photo Credit: Bona Fide Photography
And so, we wait.
We still wait for an answer.
We still wait for a miracle.
We are still waiting for the waters to be parted and for the mountains to move.
I don't write this begrudgingly as it's too late for me, four babies later.
But I write this hopeful. I write this with a big faith. I write this knowing that we will have Congressmen step up and do what is right. I write this knowing God will both open and change the hearts of mayors and CEOs to take this issue upon themselves. I write this with the certainty that we will continue to have a United States Secretary of Labor fight and plead for us, for this cause, for this right.
Almost 4 million babies are born each year in the United States.
Approximately 334,000 babies each month.
Approximately 11,000 babies every single day.
Each day, thousands of parents and babies are experiencing the epitome of joy, the sheer essence of experiencing and basking in a true miracle. And yet every single day, thousands of parents are finding themselves one day closer to the heartache of leaving, the valiant journey that they must force themselves to do.
If you want something different, you have to do something different. Without change, progress is impossible.
As often as I look back and think year after year, baby after baby, I went through such distraught days that turned into weeks that turned into months and yes, years; such physical and emotional pain being forced back to work due to not having a paid leave. I cried out to God for an answer and selfishly questioned and prayed at times, "Why couldn't it be different for me?"
I now know why. I needed to be a strong voice for millions. To cause waves. To be a gladiator for what our country's parents deserve. To believe and fight for those parents who are unable to find any hope or the strength that this can change for them.
You can do what I cannot do. I can do what you cannot do. But together we can do great, incredible things.
And so we wait.
But we will not wait quietly.
We will not wait submissively.
We will no longer wait fearfully.
We will fight together until we are heard.
We will fight together until our miracle is answered.
We will fight together until the waters have parted, until the mountains have moved.
I know one day I will be raising my hands high in the air, praising God, shrieking with a cry that I have long anticipated.
One day I know we will get to say, we believed we could...and we did.
Top Photo: Pictured above is Regan Long with her husband and children when they met with United States Secretary of Labor, Tom Perez, in Washington, D.C. in June 2015