A common phenomenon experienced by those who regularly remember their dreams is the prevalence of recurring dreams.
This can be the same dream that happens over and over again, not always on consecutive nights, but over a period of time. This can also be a dream that has the same structure and themes, but one piece of it changes each time or perhaps it is the same dream again and again until finally something in the dream shifts.
What is the function of recurring dreams?
If we remember that the function of any dream is to help move our lives forward, continuing on the human journey of exploration, growth and creativity/creation, then a recurring dream could be seen to carry a particularly important message for us.
Our dreams will have similar themes and threads that appear in many story lines until we receive the message and honor it. What elevates a recurring dream from this is that it is focused on some part of us that is more fundamental to our true nature and is deeply embedded in the patterns we play out in waking life. It's regular occurrence calls extra attention to it.
Think of a recurring dream as a friend that is gently, but continuously reminding us, "You're doing that thing again..." as they draw our attention to a habit that is so deeply engrained that it is often unconscious when it is being triggered even if we are aware of it at other times.
From this perspective, we can still approach the dream the way we would approach other dreams, paying attention to the archetypal, symbolic level of the dream for information, the emotions and embodied feeling of the dream symbols and patterns that relate to moving our lives forward.
Given that they are recurring, there is an extra tool to work with, and that is the x factor. The x factor would be any part of the recurring dream that changes OR the events in our waking lives that seem to trigger this dream to show up. (This is where keeping a dream journal can really be helpful, especially if we've been noting the date of our dreams and what is going on in our waking lives at the time.)
My most recent recurring dream went like this:
I was always about to get married to someone who didn't make sense. In some cases it was an ex-boyfriend from long ago, another time it was my cousin and another time it was a close friend. Each time I felt extreme tension around the upcoming nuptials because I really thought it was wrong to be married to this person. I always felt it was obvious and didn't understand why everyone else couldn't see that or how I even got to this point. Each time, I would break off the wedding and feel complete relief while everyone else felt angry with me.
The last time I had the dream, before I could break off the wedding, I went outside to get fresh air and ended up at the ocean. I met a guy there who showed me this super highway current that you could ride. I laid on my back in the water and floated away at turbo speed, staring up at a huge starry sky and feeling relieved, excited and whole.
It took me a long time with this dream to let go of what was obvious in waking life... that I would never even get to the point of marrying any of these people. I was really afraid that the dream was about my ability to commit to something or about sabotaging relationships that I cared about. I was clinging to the reality of the dream rather than sinking into the emotional, symbolic level.
When I was able to work with a dream practitioner, she guided me out of that space. She took me to the unique part of the dream that showed up only the last time I had it... the cool, supportive, wild space of the ocean. I went back into the dream and both described and truly felt how easy that part of the dream was. My body could physically feel how the water seemed to melt away the tension and how I surrendered to it.
I was able to see that the marriage in the dream represented the black and white, dualistic mindset that I often get caught in. You are never kind of married; either you are or you are not and it is a big commitment. At critical crossroads in waking life, I often do go to that place of black or white, yes or no, success or failure, etc. I cling to it and cut off my creativity and my ability to grow by seeing another way. I blind myself to options and keep myself stuck.
It became incredibly freeing when I got to feel the freedom of letting go when I did the dream work on this recurring dream. I was able to embody the feeling of release and possibility when I let go of the attachment I had to one way or another. Not only was it ok to do this, but when I did, I became a better person. It was necessary.
Dreams will often challenge you to to do this. Wherever the dream holds the most tension and resistance is usually where the invitation resides to our biggest learning that involves a fundamental shift in mindset, behavior or both.
Just as storytelling is a powerful tool for relating to each other, connecting and sharing in the human experience, so can dreams guide us into the same territories. I share my dreams here because we can all learn from each other's dreams since they deal with the values and themes of what it means to be alive.
I extend an open invitation to share your dreams with me and any insights or reactions you feel from sharing in my dream stories too.