THE BLOG
04/01/2014 03:13 pm ET Updated Jun 01, 2014

Truth or Consequences

Imagine knowing that something is true, but this truth is constantly questioned. If your name is Jill, for example, how would you feel if people kept calling you Jane? A little confused, I bet.

Well, as strange as it may sound, every person is born knowing that, in truth, our feelings don't come from the physical world in which we live. It's not until we're taught that an A is better than a C, a sunny day is more pleasing than a cloudy one, or a lower score on the golf course beats a higher score, that we start to question -- and become confused about -- the source of our feelings.

I remember when I was 8 years old. It was early winter and, wearing only shirtsleeves, my brother and I were outside playing catch. While it was about 30 degrees Fahrenheit that day, we weren't cold. Our mother, however, did not see it that way. She ran outside and demanded that we either stop playing or put on coats. We knew that our mother cared about us. We also knew that we felt fantastic and the cold couldn't touch us. What should we do?

The answer to that confusion lies in the fact that (as human beings) we're wired to feel only our thinking. A clear head breeds passion and enjoyment; a cluttered head, just the opposite. This means that a particular circumstance can't cause us to feel confused, anxious, or even cold. Feeling this way is the consequence of being caught between truth and untruth. Parents, teachers, and coaches (TV shows and advertisements, too) condition us to believe that a circumstance like a cold day is what we feel, when intuitively we know this is not the case.

Consider any confusion or anxiety in your life. Are you uneasy about money? Your appearance? Your batting average? An upcoming meeting? It all comes down to the degree that you mistakenly believe that these circumstances are linked to your feelings. Young children, on the other hand, are rarely distressed. Reason being: They haven't been trained (yet) to link the natural ebb and flow of their feelings to circumstances on the outside.

Deep down, everyone knows that their feelings are only connected to their thinking or level of clarity. That's why the more outside-in teaching that you strip away, the less often you'll find yourself stuck between truth and untruth -- and the simpler, happier, and more productive life you'll lead.