03/16/2015 09:55 am ET Updated May 16, 2015

Stop Waiting on Happy

Tim Robberts via Getty Images

At some point in our lives we're each going to face disappointment, pain, suffering, sadness and frustration. There are so many down moments in life---bad breakups, getting fired from a job, losing a loved one, facing a health issue, the list goes on. Each of us handles these scenarios extremely differently, and that's part of what makes us so unique. We all react differently and manage our emotions differently.

But, why do we have to go through these situations in order to turn our lives around and create change?

What is holding you back from creating change in your life?

What are you waiting for?

As my wonderful friend and fellow coach Mary Sabo so eloquently recites, "Stop waiting on happy." It's time to take control and design the lives that we want.

It's really easy to get caught up living the life other people envisioned for you.

There was a several year period of time that I was convinced I was destined to own a social media agency. When I say I envisioned that I basically thought, well, I seem to be doing well in this industry, everyone is telling me how good I am at it. Plus, I knew I wanted to do my own thing sometime sooner than later, so I thought maybe this was the place to start.

I never felt like an expert at anything so I allowed other people's views of me to dictate my life. I got so caught up in others' visions that I just went with the flow. I was always someone to make a move when something wasn't working for me but I was falling into the same traps everywhere I went, and none of them were doing it for me. You're so good at [fill in the blank], I was told, so I would start doing that. After all, almost every job I had in the past ten years was a job I created for myself - there was nobody I was replacing.

I had a consulting gig for a few months and it was like pulling teeth to get content out of me. I was uninspired, unmotivated and kept realizing it was really not what I wanted to do, despite being told how great I was at it. It just wasn't working for me.

When I think about my major life shifts I remember them happening when I was at really low points. At times where there was truly no lower bottom than where I was. Whether it was partying too hard in college and pulling myself out of that to recognize I was wrecking my body, mind and relationship with my parents, or going through a life-altering surgery that also reminded me to take care of myself.

These were moments in time when I had to pause and recognize that I had control, and by having control over myself I could determine my next move. Sure, I could stay in my comfort zone despite it being uncomfortable, or I could veer onto another path, one that may appear challenging and scary but was exactly what I needed for myself.

As we plunge into the spring, let's take a moment to think about our lives and truly determine what it is that we want to change and the actions we want to take.

This plan needs to be for you and only you.

This isn't someone else's agenda for your life, this is putting your time in crisis aside and focusing on the present and what it is that you want in your future. You have the power to change things, to take control of your life, and really, to stop waiting on happy.

So what's that happy, fulfilling and inspiring life going to look like and how are you going to get yourself to that point? It's easy to think about Point A and Point B but what steps do you need to take in between to get from A to B?

Remember, life may get tough sometimes and have its down moments but we each have the power to remain in control. We can control what path we take, what decisions we make, how to break our patterns towards our own version of success.