THE BLOG
01/22/2015 05:58 am ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

Blackberry Now Officially Delusional

Head-in-the-Sand CEO John Chen demands that ALL app makers be LEGALLY OBLIGATED to create a Blackberry version whenever they create an iOS or Android app

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CEO John Chen at his "Sand Desk"

Back in 2012, we laid out a clear strategy for Blackberry to save itself: ditch the proprietary Blackerry operating system, adopt Android and marry the best of the Blackberry form factor and keyboard with the cornucopia of Android apps to come.

Instead, Blackberry decided to ignore reality and plow ahead with a strategy that will ensure its demise. This is the resulting share price debacle:

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Now the company has taken another delusional turn. Since it lost the game in the open marketplace it wants the government to step in and MANDATE that all apps in the iPhone Appstore and the Google Play store must be replicated for Blackberry.

Attention NASDAQ:BBRY investors: There is NO ONE AT THE HELM - THERE IS NOBODY HOME!!!

Despite Blackberry's MANY attempts to kill its own business at every turn there are still diehard users who refuse to let the device out of their clutches. I know some of these last-standers. They are there in the shadows having waited years for Uber to finally deliver an app for them.

They are still waiting for more than 500,000 other app developers to show up with an app for their base of users which is shrinking faster than a deflating Patriots football.

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What is next for Delusional Blackberry? How about a Cheshire Cat OS? It gives you a big smile every time you want to do something practical with your device other than send email.

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Hey Blackberry -- we will be looking for you in the Way Back Machine -- https://archive.org/web/

Author's Note: This piece is parody and satire since there can be no other reaction to the everamazing stream of news from BBRY