01/05/2007 09:23 pm ET Updated May 25, 2011

Are You All Ready for the Latest Catechism on Terror?

Good morning, children. Are you all ready for today's catechism lesson on terrorism? It comes to us direct from the Holy Office of Homeland Security, with an imprimatur from His Eminence Michael Cardinal Chertoff and a Nihil Obstat from His Excellency Richard Cheney, Archbishop of the West Wing. But don't worry about those fancy Latin words; they won't be on the test.

Now here's our catechism:

Question: What do you call a man who has been wiretapped talking about a picnic in terms that might possibly be construed as the coded components of a plot to attack civilians?

Answer: A terrorist.

Question: What do you call a man who launches a war that has never been justified by any credible threat to his nation and that has actually killed at least 30,000 civilians?

Answer: President of the United States.