01/01/2012 08:18 pm ET Updated Mar 02, 2012

God's Top Ten New Year's Resolutions, 2012

Hello, everyone, God here again. Although you might not think it to look at me, I am often given to deep introspection, and this time of year finds me just as contemplative as the rest of you. In fact, much like my subjects, I figure I better get these resolutions down now because if I don't commit to them I will just break them within the week. In any case, I hope you appreciate my sharing my goals with you. Even a supreme being needs a little accountability. Peace out.

God's Top Ten New Year's Resolutions 2012

James Napoli is an author and humorist. More of his comedy content for the web can be found here.