12/27/2013 10:48 am ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

God's Top Ten New Year's Resolutions


Hey, everybody, God here. Like most of you, I am prone to self-reflection as one year passes inexorably into another. It is a time to think about what I might be able to do differently and how I might improve myself and my position in the world. By demonstrating that even I, an all-powerful entity, would still like to get a leg up on things, I hope to provide inspiration and motivation to you mere mortals. So come on, lowly sinners, make this year your best ever!

God's Top Ten New Year's Resolutions, 2014

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