A number of readers have asked me for more details about my travels on the rocky road to Sveltesville, wanting me to further share my secrets that led me from a size 18 to a size 4, and how I came to be our country's leading authority on Permanent Fat Removal.
This isn't your typical fat-to-thin story. So, sit back, get cozy and get ready for a fat-melting read!
One day I woke up FAT! I mean really FAT.
To be clear, it wasn't the first time that I'd woken up FAT. In fact, I was born FAT. I was the only baby in the hospital nursery to gain weight (babies traditionally lose an ounce or two their first week on the planet - but not me)! An ominous sign! And by the time second grade rolled around, I weighed-in at 112 pounds. YIKES! It was Yo-Yo City from there on in.
Now back to the future ... THE morning of ALL mornings!
On this history making morning, when I woke up fat, I was discombobulated (more than usual). So, after my shower, instead of grabbing the towel and then my glasses, I grabbed my glasses and passed a full-length mirror on the way to the towel.
Get the picture? I did!
I was shocked to see that my fat roll had grown its own fat roll. The unexpected truth was undeniably right smack dab in front of me. I could no longer ignore the fact that the fat monster had once again taken over. I had to stop HIM in his tracks!
So, right then and there (after I painstakingly picked out the lightest weigh-in outfit I could find), I dragged myself to one of those weight loss centers where people obsess about food and the scale. (You know the place I'm talking about, yes?) I was depressed, defeated and deprived before I even weighed-in (sound familiar?); and then, when I did weigh in ... Whoa Nelly! Tears came to my eyes. It was, indeed, my highest number ever.
I joined the group for the lecture. As the tears made their way down my cheek, I thought, "I'm never going to make it." That's when I heard the voice, which I later came to realize was the voice of Our Lady of Weight Loss. She said, "If you think you're never going to make it, you never will." Now, I suppose we all pretty much know that our actions follow our thoughts, but when Our Lady spoke those words to me, it felt as though I had been hit over the head with a Zen celery stick. I was AWAKENED!
I shifted from deep despair to happy in a millisecond! I was excited! Our Lady of Weight Loss had snap-crackle-popped my mind into a new place. I had a deep and powerful understanding that I no longer needed to be depressed, hate myself or be mean to myself over extra fat cells - or over a number on the scale. I let it go. And when I let it go ... when I stopped being mean to myself ... when I practiced forgiveness, I was able to move on!
I was able to move towards my compelling future. Have you ever watched an Olympic swimmer push off the side of the pool? It is quite amazing, isn't it? The thrust, the power, their determination is enormous. Often the strength of this one solitary push can propel the Olympian right straight into the middle of the Olympic-sized pool.
When we decide to go on a 'diet,' we essentially push off from the side of the 'pool of discontent.' We gather a vast amount of energy from not liking ourselves, being disgusted, and ashamed of how we look. We don't like ourselves. No, we sure don't.
Sometimes this energy takes us half way to our goal weight. Sometimes all the way ... 10, 20, 30, 100, 200 pounds lost. Then what?
Unlike the Olympic swimmer who has a plan; who is moving toward her big win; who sees herself as a champion and knows with every cell and fiber of her being that she is the victor, we only know ourselves to be losers. We are basing this attempt on past attempts to lose, which have failed.
It is easy to get lost if you don't know where you are going. If you want to be victorious at the game of Permanent Fat Removal, then you need to have a compelling future. You need to know where you are going; what you want; what removing those pounds means. The diet and exercise plans do not live alone. This is a holistic event. It's about your life, not your fat.
I will leave you with this ... one final thought.
EVOLVE, don't just improve!
Spread the word, NOT the icing!