12/14/2014 10:37 pm ET Updated Feb 13, 2015

21 Eureka Moments That Only Runners Have

Eureka moments of genius are common to runners. They happen mid-run as a result of fatigue, high endorphins, low cortisol, self-righteousness, and a groovy "one-with-naturedness" that would make Ralph Waldo Emerson envious. However, like shooting stars, these epic revelations often fade to black moments later.

  • Health insurance would be so much cheaper if everybody did what I'm doing.
  • I really need to get one of those rain buckets, and maybe raise some chickens too.
  • Damn you, diesel-belching trucks that pollute the air! I'm trying to breathe.
  • An Ironman finish would be spectacular; I just need to learn how to swim for miles.
  • I can live without cable. No, I can't. Yes, I can.
  • Dogs really are man's best friend -- except that one...
  • Wouldn't it be nice if these roads had running lanes made of wood chips?
  • Will running help me enjoy a longer life or just enjoy being alive?
  • We should really make a decision on kilometers vs. miles.
  • I wonder if I'm missing something in a place that I'll never visit?
  • There must be other life forms running on other planets.
  • People should be OK with other people drinking from their garden hose.
  • I could calculate my distance using these mile markers if I started where the road began.
  • I can totally wear tights without shorts in the winter
  • Just saw a wild turkey limping across the road with a broken foot... Nature's a bitch.
  • A hill is just a flat road at an angle, so get over it. Literally.
  • If our knees bent the other way, I bet my quads would be tight all the time.
  • I wonder if I could reuse the salt on my skin? Nah, that'd be gross.
  • We should go somewhere at some point in the future and do something awesome. Definitely.
  • I'm so tired and thirsty. These people trapped in cars don't know what they're missing.
  • If a runner poops in the trees and nobody sees him, did it really happen?

What "eureka moments" have you had? Share your thoughts in the comments.