THE BLOG
01/12/2015 04:51 pm ET Updated Mar 14, 2015

New Year, New You? No Way!

During the first few weeks of each new year, I feel overwhelmed with the deluge of advice for how I might improve my life. Lose weight. Save more. Get more sleep. Work harder. The basic message underlying all of these suggestions is that we are not good enough as we are, and therefore we ought to change to improve the quality of our lives.

These messages are actually more destructive than helpful. They illuminate our insecurities, poor and often ill-informed choices made in the past, and the life circumstances that lead us to feel out of control. By focusing on what we don't have or are not, we are setting ourselves up for continued failure.

Rather than focus on changing myself, I take all of the well-intended messages floating around and use them as a reminder that I deserve optimal health, financial stability, meaningful work, and a joyous, vibrant life. I also think about the steps I have taken toward realizing these important values and tweak them so that I am moving closer and closer to who I really, truly am to make the most of my precious life.

Each new year, I realize more of myself rather than struggling to change who I am, or rather who others think I am. This positive approach is inspiring, empowering, and transformational. I am no longer trying to fit into the mold, but becoming more self-aware as well as more appreciative and understanding of my gifts. I become more attuned to the nuances of my desires, capabilities, and actions and am better able to integrate these for fulfilling life experiences.

To me, the new year's resolutions frenzy serves as a helpful reminder that I sometimes get lost underneath the layers of life that shuffle around my priorities and perceptions. It is a time to reflect and renew my commitment to myself. So my advice to you this new year is to be happy being yourself! You are special and loved as you are, and I hope that you will become more of your true self in 2015.