11/30/2013 10:03 am ET Updated Jan 30, 2014

The Prayer of the Consumer

Pope Francis has noted that people are more into shopping values than human values. Seeing how Thanksgiving was sacrificed at the Altar of Cash, his points come at the right time.

Maybe in response and to make the point backwards, the Church could put the following liturgy in the daily missile that contains the prayers of the Mass under a separate section called The Liturgy of the Consumer (after the Liturgy of the Eucharist).

This prayer can be redeemed at retailers on Thanksgiving and Black Friday, or whenever you are buying stuff no one needs.

Let us all rise to repeat the Prayer of the Consumer.

Leader:You are next in line. Is that all you have.
Congregant: Yes, it is.
Leader: That will be $159.99. Will that be cash, credit, or debit?
Congregant: That will be debit.
Leader: Please slide your card and enter your PIN.
Congregant: (performs the ceremonial sliding of the card and entering of the PIN)
Leader: You are approved and here is your receipt.
Congregant: Thank you.
Leader: Have a nice day.
Congregant: You also.