Find out if you're more news-savvy than the editors of Iran's Fars news service.
Here are some random but actual hints: If they both have nukes, that red line will be radioactive; proof that crime that pays doesn't pay; he should have googled "oops;" and he's licensed to bite. Answers are at the bottom of the quiz.
1) Why has Bank of America agreed to pay $2.43 billion?
a. To settle lawsuits stemming from its acquisition of financial services firm Merrill Lynch
b. To finalize its purchase of three Spanish government-linked banks
c. To purchase "underwater" mortgages from borrowers
d. To replenish the pension fund of its 45,000 retirees
2) Who demanded before the United Nations that world leaders establish a "clear red line" to prevent Iran from developing nuclear weapons?
a. President Barack Obama
b. Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu
c. Egyptian President Mohamed Morsi
d. Jordanian King Abdullah II
3) Who flunked a test of English history given by TV host David Letterman?
a. GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney
b. President Barack Obama
c. British-born conservative historian Niall Ferguson
d. British Prime Minister David Cameron
4) Why did Mia Love, an African-American Republican mayor of Saratoga Springs, Utah, tell Fox News she was "disappointed" by a package she received in the mail?
a. Instead of containing the new J.K. Rowling book she had ordered from Amazon, it contained 22 dead lab rats
b. It contained a poster labeling her as an "anchor baby" born here to her immigrant parents
c. Her steak-of-the-month club sent her vegan food instead
d. The package contained racist and abortion-related materials
5) Who told 7,000 members of Germany's Christian Democratic Union that they needed to be more tolerant toward the three million Muslims living in that country?
a. German Chancellor Angela Merkel
b. Egyptian President Mohamed Morsi
c. Turkish Prime Minister Tayyip Erdogan
d. Comedian Stephen Colbert
6) Who donated $1 million this week to the pro-Obama superPAC Priorities USA Action?
a. Sex in the City star Sarah Jessica Parker
b. Former President Bill Clinton
c. Billionaire investor George Soros
d. Comedian Stephen Colbert
7) Nakoula Basseley Nakoula, the man behind the amateur anti-Islam video that rocked the Muslim world, has been arrested. Why?
a. Violations of his parole on previous financial convictions
b. Violating California state hate-crime laws
c. Federal blasphemy charges
d. He is being held financially liable for damage to U.S. businesses in the Middle East that sustained damage in the riots
8) Why did Apple CEO Tim Cook publicly apologize this week?
a. WiFi problems users are having with Apple's latest mobile operating system
b. The way Apple's new Mountain Lion operating system makes folders disappear from some users' Mail programs
c. The poor performance of the Apple Maps application in its latest mobile operating system
d. Worker riots at the Chinese factory that produces Apple products
9) What was the satirical story from American humor site The Onion that was reported as fact by Iranian news agency Fars?
a. "Israeli PM Addresses UN, Says It's Time to Party Like It's 99"
b. "Gallup Poll: Rural Whites Prefer Ahmadinejad to Obama"
c. "America's Youth Bribed with Drugs, Sex to Get Good Grades in School"
d. "Discovered at Last: America's Founding Father Was the Great Satan"
10) What did actor and former California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger tell 60 Minutes was "the stupidest thing" he ever did to his wife, Maria Shriver?
a. Demand she agree to an "open marriage"
b. Bring her to Sacramento with him when he became governor
c. Marry her
d. Father a child with their housekeeper
BONUS QUESTION) What notable achievement belongs to Nikka, a drug-sniffing dog in the New Mexico town of Vaughn?
a. Nikka is the only "certified" member of the local police force, after the police chief resigned and the only other human officer is forbidden to carry a weapon due to a past court case
b. Nikka, who died after being run over by a local drug gang, has been cloned by Texas A&M researchers
c. Nikka discovered $4 million worth of cocaine in a vehicle belonging to the Canadian consulate
d. Nikka doesn't exist; the town is so poor, its police force created a digital version of a German shepherd and planted news stories with fake photos in local newspapers to scare local drug runners
ANSWERS: 1) a. 2) b. 3) d. 4) d. 5) a. 6) c. 7) a. 8) c. 9) b. 10) d. BONUS) a.
EXPLANATIONS OF THE HINTS: Israel is trying to establish a threshold for an international response to Iran's nuclear ambitions; he was on probation for some money-related crimes, and was arrested for violating his probation rules; Apple's replacement of the Google Maps gold standard app with its own beta-level app suggests that the two companies might want to patch up their once-solid relationship; and the rest of what remains of the police force is not able to legally carry a gun, so the only weaponry they have is Nikka.