A relationship can be stressful, even when both people live in the same area, so a little distance can really complicate matters. But just because it may be difficult is no reason to think it is impossible or doomed for failure. With the right preparation and mindset a long distance relationship can flourish. By changing the way you think about the relationship you can have a healthy one. So, drop the notion that all good relationships are local and follow the tips below to ease your long distance relationship anxiety.
1. Define the relationship and have an end goal.
Are you exclusive to each other or just dating? Have a conversation with your significant other about your respective needs, what you both want out of the relationship, and where it is headed.
2. Establish rules.
Can you see others? If so, what does that mean exactly?
3. Maintain daily contact to ensure a strong emotional connection.
Schedule time to speak. Be imaginative, creative, and sexy. Whenever possible rely on direct communication and avoid instant message and texting -- there's too much opportunity for mis-interpretation using these methods. Skype or Facetime are a good option when more direct communication isn't possible. Stay connected with each other on everyday happenings such as work, socializing, friends, and activities -- all the things you'd talk about if you lived in the same area.
4. Schedule visits.
This gives you something to look forward to and puts parameters around the long distance relationship. Knowing that you'll see each other certain weekends and holidays will provide peace of mind. Plan vacations together to create newness and progression in the relationship rather than just maintaining status quo.
5. Replicate doing things together as best as possible.
For example, watch a television show or movie simultaneously and talk about it after.
6. Embrace the geographic expansion.
Recognize that your partner is in a new city and with that comes new acquaintances and social groups. Don't be jealous if there's talk about new people. Rather, look forward to meeting them.
7. Look at the benefits of the long distance relationship.
People often lose a part of their individuality when in a relationship so you now have an opportunity to pursue your own interests that he/she wasn't so into. Get out there and discover things you haven't had time to explore, reconnect with friends, visit family, etc. See the geographic separation as temporary and enjoy the excitement of seeing him or her after a long absence.
For more tips on healthy relationships and living check out my book BE FEARLESS: Change Your Life in 28 Days.