09/16/2014 05:07 pm ET Updated Feb 02, 2016

Is John Travolta Gay? Who Cares?

In a recent interview with The Daily Beast's Marlow Stern, John Travolta is once again discussing but not defending decade-old rumors that he is gay.

Antoinette Bueno of ET Online explains the source of the latest rumors:

According to The Hollywood Reporter, Douglas Gotterba -- who worked for John Travolta's aircraft company Alto in the '80s -- will get the opportunity to argue in a lawsuit that he holds no confidentiality duties to the Grease actor, and is therefore free to write a book he's allegedly been planning.

While all this continues to be fodder for the media machine, Travolta appears undaunted, telling Stern, "This is every celebrity's Achilles heel. It's just about people wanting money."

As a gay man, I am deeply saddened by stories such as this, as the coming-out process is never quite the same for everyone, but it remains highly personal nonetheless. John Travolta's sexual orientation is nobody's business other than his own, and the damaging nature of the speculation should be familiar to anyone whose sexuality has been called into question or who has been called "fag," "faggot," "queen" or any of a host of far more derogatory names.

My struggle is not so much with the media, as many of us do in fact take the higher road, but with the LGBT community. It seems to me that the heavens open up and the rainbow flag descends with almost unworldly pomp and circumstance when a celebrity publicly declares himself or herself lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or the like. Add to this a wedding or commitment ceremony and nothing is held back. But as a man who grew up after Stonewall but before the existence of the dynamic advocacy and gay-straight alliances that blossomed in the mid-'80s and continue to flourish today, I wonder without apology why more of my LGBT brothers and sisters do not make just as much noise when celebrities are questioned about their sexuality.

I have not seen a gay celebrity asked if they are sure that they are in fact attracted to the same sex, nor have I seen gay advocates support the likes of John Travolta and the many other celebrities who've come under fire for allegedly living a lie.

I am saddened that this community that knows the sting of name calling, finger pointing and far worse offenses is not doing more -- that I am not doing more -- to defend those in Hollywood who should be allowed to have a personal life that remains personal.

Wake up, GLAAD! Have something to say, HRC, as well as the rest of you who have made them the celebrities that they are only to remain silent when they are unfairly attacked.

We are a community fighting for equality, but this does not allow us the right to pick and choose whom we fight for. When the "gay agenda" is attacked, we are all at risk, and I would hope that we once and for all stop seeing it as an "us against them" world.

Mr. Travolta, you have brought so much joy to so many, and you have also suffered one of the greatest losses: the death of a child. I apologize for not doing more, and I am deeply sad that my community has seemingly abandoned you.