07/02/2010 04:00 am ET Updated Nov 17, 2011

Getting Home

Whilst I'm trapped in Europe for another week, with my schedule thrown into disaster mode, I can't help thinking how "humorous" all of this is.... especially since I'm trapped in Porto, Portugal with 300 marines who touched down a few days ago...

This whole scenario is reminiscent of Steve Martin and John Candy's Planes, Trains, and Automobiles" (Steve Martin misses his flight and struggles to get home for Thanksgiving) or even director Todd Phillips' upcoming movie, Due Date. (Robert Downey Jr. misses his flight and struggles to get across cross country to make it in time for the birth of his child).

With airports closed down and hundreds of flights canceled, what lengths will we go to get home?

-Harry Bunyaraksh, country head of CLSA Securities (Thailand), is contemplating taking a British Navy ship in Porthsmouth to the Spanish port near Bilbao and training it to Madrid, then taking a flight from Madrid to Bangkok.

-Photographer Jacob Pitcher is lamenting the fact that his wife Anya is trapped in Turkmenistan, and damning the Icelandic volcano for selfishly "belching celibacy all over Europe."

-Fraser Cooke, the NIKE Global Energy Marketing Director is deliberating whether or not to take the Orient Express from Paris. Afterwards he'd transfer to the Trans-Siberian railway, hop aboard a ferry to Hokkaido, and take a flight from there to Tokyo, Japan. It'll just take him... oh.. 15 days.

-Masaya Kuroki, of the International DJ duo and design team KITSUNE, is enjoying his time in Porto since he doubts he'll be going anywhere soon, but has booked three trains in order to make it back to Paris. (The 300 marines are currently residing at his hotel)

-D.V. DeVincentis is stuck in London after filming his latest movie.. and is offering drinks to friends to come and hang out.

-Vanity Fair's man about Saigon, Brian McNally is biding this time in London till he can make it to NYC. When asked if he was leaving anytime soon, he replied "Hell if I know."

And with Eurostar tickets now tripled in price and trains and ferries booked to capacity, what else can we do but wait it out.

And though I lack John Cleese's taxi fare budget ( a whopping $5,000 to make it back to the UK from Norway)... at least I can lookback on all this and thank Monty Python for teaching me to, "Always look on the bright side of life."

All the best from sunny Portugal (thank God the WiFi works)