I read the article in Huff/Post 50 today, Why Baby Boomers Aren't Getting Laid Anymore, by Dr. Robert Lusson. http://huff.to/1pjkkrp. I felt compelled to comment after reading his opening statement. "I guess it's called 'hooking up' now. Whatever. The fact is -- irrespective of what you call it -- many Baby Boomers are not doing it or getting it anymore." I posted a comment but that didn't seem enough because I was still pissed off so I decided to take the conversation about baby boomers and their sexuality further.
Real Life Versus Statistics
In 10 years of writing about boomer sex, dating, and relationships, date coaching, and reading thousands of readers' comments the notion that many of my generation are no longer sexual is hysterical nonsense seeking validation. An article like this is okay if it's meant to reinforce the importance of sex, but not okay when if it's meant to paint boomers as sexually dead. So in my opinion this topic is a non-starter because sex isn't any more about age today than it was yesterday or any time in the past for that matter. Social invisibility? I never met a boomer who cared whether or not young people noticed them. I get triggered when anyone writes about baby boomers when they intimate our sexuality is in question, and I also wonder who they interviewed to divine their information.
Aunt Bee Is Hot
And the notion that younger people may consider Aunt Bee having sex is a visual image purposely intended to make the notion of Aunt Bee being sexual as revolting to younger people. We all felt disgusted when we were younger and considered our parents having sex. But we were teens and todays' teens opinions don't count either. And Aunt Bee and every other baby boomer that still has sex regularly doesn't need anyone to suggest or project any sexual images of us in any light other than wonderful and ongoing.
The Media Flood
The television commercials for Viagra and Cialis always portray middle-aged, good-looking couples smiling at each other in a way that suggests sex is on their menu. And that's okay with me because I think those products, as well as estrogen rings and other sex-related products aimed at boomers, are worthwhile and helpful. But the notion that the majority of boomers require these products to remain sexual is flawed.
Great sex for boomers may be enhanced with these products but it's the emotional bond between boomer men and women that determines great sex, not pills or e-rings and boomer couples that are no longer sexual have choices other than meds to alter their sexual relationships for the better.
In my wide circle of boomer friends I'm only aware of one that isn't still sexual and I include in this the men I've met with twice a month for 25 years who don't hold anything back regarding their relationships, especially sex. Is this anecdotal? Sure, but everyone's life is made up of anecdotal experiences and they're typically as accurate as the statistics behind this article.
Articles like this that suggest boomers have become sexually challenged and they employ statistics as their basis, but we're not numbers. We're people and statistics can be skewed to fit any writer's needs. I suggest that there are nearly as many couples under boomer age that aren't having sex, and their reasons are similar to those boomers that may not be sexual on a regular basis, lack of emotional connection or opportunity. And frankly I don't consider the image of couples in their 40s or 50s having sex any more beautiful than those in their 60s or beyond and I suspect that for young people sex for anyone over 30 is disgusting.
It's articles like this that suggest we're no longer attractive to 20-somethings that perpetuate the notion that boomers should all feel sexually neutered simply because younger people can't imagine us having sex or think we're gross because we're older. We don't care what they think and I don't know one boomer who stopped having sex because younger people thought he or she was over the hill sexually.
Thank You Doctor
I should thank Dr. Lusson for annoying me sufficient to defend my generation's sexuality and dispel any younger people's notions that we care what you think about our sexuality or our visibility. We're the original sex, drugs and rock and roll generation and there's a reason why sex was the first word in that motto. It's because we freed America from feeling sexually repressed and while most of us have moved beyond casual sex we haven't by any means given it up.
Dr. Lusson ended by stating, "There is more work to be done. My research on sexual and social invisibility and aging continues to yield fascinating data that is both surprising and illuminating. Myself and others in the field press on, gaining understanding, building awareness, inching forward."
Hey Doc, you and your colleagues may find boomer sexuality and social invisibility illuminating and fascinating data, but this real life boomer considers your article a major stretch of the truth meant to appeal to prurient readers. Numbers may not lie but they can mislead. While you and your colleagues are inching forward in your invaluable research about our sexuality we're living it to the fullest. Thanks for reminding me, and my fellow boomers why hysterical articles about us are mostly wrong and quickly forgotten.