I recently got this letter and thought it would be valuable to share my response with everybody. It's applicable to anything you are avoiding hunkering down on.
I'm 26 and a yoga teacher who feels stuck in her life. I hope you can help me. When I was 18, I had no idea what I wanted to do, so my parents encouraged me to travel. This led me to massage school, which led me to yoga training, which led me to more yoga training, and now I've been a yoga teacher for three years.
Here's my problem. I have so many ideas that I have a hard time just committing to one. I have a pattern of trying things out and then moving on to something else. I want to teach at yoga retreats and make money at it. I'm supporting myself through my yoga, but I end up so scattered and I feel like things just come to a halt, because a new idea comes in and I'm off again in another direction. I'd like to be more consistent and disciplined. I feel like I'm spinning my wheels and getting nowhere.
Kelly (in New York)
First of all, know that there is nothing wrong. It sounds like you're done being a gypsy girl and want to put down roots to be more grounded. That's great news. It means you're ready to create something new.
Here's what I want you to do. Create a "2013 vision" for yourself in the area of career. Write out exactly what you want to create. For example, you could write that by next December you want to have built your yoga teaching practice into leading regular retreats, be teaching 25 classes a month, and making X amount of dollars as a yoga instructor.
Next, you're going to design a 12-month action plan for your career. First, you will need to figure out what laws you are living by in your life that are not working for you. There are rules you are following that are not helping you in your career. For example, maybe one of your laws is, "Yogis don't network." If you are trying to build your yoga teaching practice, that's not a good law to follow. Write them all down so you can see them. Then, make a list of new laws that will support your 2013 vision. You need a set of rules and promises that do not let you fall back into your old habits and patterns. For example, you are not allowed to start any new random projects. For the next 12 months, you are committed to building one career: your yoga teaching.
Then, you will design daily, weekly and monthly promises that will help you achieve your vision. You will teach three classes a week in February and then four classes a week in March, adding a defined number of new classes every month. You will network three times a week. You will design and promote three yoga retreats before the end of the year. No straying from your plan. You can waitress or do other work to help subsidize yourself, but your main focus is building your yoga teaching practice.
Your next step is to find a coach or buddy who will approve your vision and make sure it's doable. Also, you will need your buddy to help you be accountable for your action plan. This person will help you hold your promises, because at the moment, you can't be trusted to do it yourself. Don't worry, you're not alone. Most people need help when it comes to accountability.
Lastly, you need to come up with some self-imposed consequences to help you keep your promises for your vision. If you don't do your networking one day, you owe an extra workout that week or you lose your wine on Friday night. Come up with a consequence that will have you keep your promises, so you can make your 2013 vision happen.
Keep us posted!
P.S. Our Life Coaching Crash Course will get you dealing and on track to your dreams for 2013 and beyond! If you have a question or issue you want Lauren to help you solve, visit Ask Lauren for more info.
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