08/07/2013 12:16 pm ET Updated Oct 07, 2013

Friends After Divorce

Denise Richards was interviewed on OWN recently and talked about her relationship with ex-husband Charlie Sheen. While their divorce seemed to be a nasty one according to press reports, their lives together now appear calm. The two stars are happy to be spending time together with their children. In fact, they go on vacations together. Richards said in the interview, "He knows I don't judge him and he knows that I will be there for him no matter what -- and vice versa."

When you are going through a divorce, you probably could never think of being friends with your ex. If you have children together, you need to both think about what's best for them. If you are arguing with your ex after the divorce is final, look at why you're still not getting along. If each parent is doing what they are supposed to according to the divorce agreement and for the children, then there should be no hostility. It begins with both exes working together for the benefit of the kids. Here are some things to keep in mind as you co-parent with your ex-spouse.

Get On With Your Lives: The both of you need to forget about the bad things that happened during your marriage. Now it's time to get on with your lives for the well-being of your children.

Learn to Like Each Other Again: Things went badly in your marriage, but don't forget that you liked each other at one time. Try to be friends again. It can only help toward making a peaceful existence for the kids.

Alleviate the Pressure: You probably spent a long time with your ex-spouse trying to make your marriage work. Now that you're divorced, the pressure is off the two of you.

Communicate More: Two spouses not communicating is one of the big reasons a marriage ends. Speak to each other and let the other one know what you're feeling with regard to the kids.

Don't Annoy Each Other: You certainly know what annoys your ex and your ex knows what bothers you. It's easier to make it work between you both when you keep those things in mind.

Think of the Children First: Make sure you and your ex always think of the children first. If you find yourself having a moment of resentment regarding the marriage, consider what is best for the kids.

Have a Peaceful Night: If your ex does something that's irritating, you don't have to bring the negativity home with you anymore. You get to go to your own bed and have a good night's sleep.

For more information on parenting after divorce, pick up Lois Tarter's new book "The Divorce Ritual" by clicking here.