You've been here for years. You even picked up a slight accent. You eat food from a deli and know how to take the subway without even having to open your trusty app on your smart phone. That qualifies you as New Yorker, right? Wrong. We put together a list of seven things you must do before being christened as a true New Yorker. (Sidenote: if you have taken a bus tour in the last two years, this list is null and void. You will need to reapply for New Yorker accreditation in the next three years.)
Eat at a food truck -- While we don't suggest making this a regular occurrence because it could eventually deteriorate your precious organs, you have to be comfortable with ordering from a restaurant on wheels to be considered a New Yorker. Eventually you will stumble across a favorite, or two, and be weary of the trucks you need to steer clear of.
Spent a week living off 99 cent pizza -- It's no secret that NYC is one of the most expensive places on earth. (Yes, the entire globe.) Therefore, you've probably had a week or two where you were simply riding the struggle bus, but somehow you ended up driving. With that being said, with all the extravagant eateries in the city, one of the most convenient and cost-efficient creations if definitely dollar pizza. It's quick, cheap and pretty tasty. When the bank account is at rock bottom, New Yorkers know where to go.
Walk through a tourist's picture, unbothered -- After a few months in the city, you will eventually escape the realm of "tourist" and remain stuck somewhere in limbo until you can claim to be a full-fledged New Yorker. We know, it sucks, but we don't make the rules. After you know your way around a bit and have a month long metro pass, you begin to steadily become bothered by the surplus of visitors in your beloved city. In due time, they will be easily ignored by a simple increase in your headphone volume as you walk through the ever-busy streets of NY.
Live life unfazed by literally everything -- Honestly, even if Batman himself walks by, any real New Yorker will maintain their lethargic demeanor as they continue to maneuver through the tumultuous NY streets. While on the train, on the sidewalk, or riding by in a cab, you will probably witness between five and ten outrageous happenings a day. Whether it's a singing drug addict, or Sarah Jessica Parker shopping in SoHo, it begins to lose it enticement. You know you've transcended into New Yorker territory when you can walk past newsworthy occurrences without the blink of an eye.
Have bedbugs -- They're everywhere -- in the movie theaters, on the subways, in cabs, etc. Eventually, after enough trips throughout the boroughs, they will be in your bed, nestled in your pillows and littered throughout your closet. The monotonous, mundane task of ridding your life of bedbugs is very irritating but very common and even more necessary. The process of washing any article that one of those tiny little critters may have navigated its way to, is one that all New Yorkers dread. The extermination process may be more painful than the bugs, honestly. So, in effort to stay abreast with common clichés, don't let the bedbugs bite.
Begin to avoid the places you once loved -- Remember when you first moved here? Oh how you adored the pretty, twinkling lights of Times Square, the abundant stores in SoHo, and the meticulous architecture throughout the city. Well, once you become a proven New Yorker, not only do these things no longer faze you, but they annoy you. Either that or the reactions to said things annoy you. Yes, it's a pretty building, now keep walking tourist. The madhouse that is Times Square will eventually turn into the worst place on earth because of the insane amounts of visitors walking aimlessly on the sidewalks. When you reach the point where you no longer find an interest in many of the places you found interesting, you might be a New Yorker.
Fall asleep on the subway -- we saved this one for last, because it is the deal breaker as to whether or not you have the credentials to be a New Yorker. The subway is a scary place for newcomers, and most wouldn't dream of a cat nap on one. For the simple fact that one could miss their stop or get something snatched, it's a rational fear to have and we won't judge anyone for it. However, once you learn to nestle your belongings securely in your possession, and simply "rest your eyes" in a way that allows you to hear you stop being called, you can call yourself a New Yorker. The fact of the matter is, most people who live here are tired, and a subway nap is a glorious occurrence that New Yorkers cherish.
If you've done everything on this list, congratulations kid, you made it.