01/20/2015 04:03 pm ET Updated Mar 22, 2015

Are You Focused on The Process Or The Outcome?

We'd all love to know the future -- to know that everything turns out the way we want it to. Some of us spend a lot of time thinking about the future and doing all we can to control it. Or we get caught up on thinking about the past and how we wish we had done it differently. Yet every moment we think about the past or the future we are not in the process of experiencing our life.

I read an account of a woman's journey with her dying friend. On the day of her death the dying woman was radiant as she told her friend that it didn't matter if she lived for 20 more minutes or 20 more years -- it was the process that counts.

What are you missing out on in the moment by thinking about the past or the future? What are you avoiding in the moment by thinking about the past or the future? Are you living your life in gratitude for life, and in kindness and compassion for yourself and others in this moment, or are you anxiously trying to change the past and control the future?

The first step in being present in the process of life is about being in the fullness of the moment of your experience. It's about fully feeling and being present for your inner experience -- both the pain and the joy. It's about living your life being in your body, being mindful of your feelings, of your inner experience, instead of being in your head with thoughts of the past or future.

Being in your head ruminating about the past or the future is a major contributor to anxiety, along with the lies you may tell yourself about who you really are. Yet when you are not in the moment, you might not even know that you are creating your anxiety. You feel anxious and run for the pill, the food, the alcohol, the TV, or you get angry, numb out, or try to fix someone -- anything to take away the anxiety that you are causing.

Life has presented me with a lot of challenges in my life. When my house burned down, it was one challenge after another. It's as if my higher self was saying to me, "Okay, you've done a huge amount of inner work -- now put it into practice by staying in the moment regardless of what is going on."

When I stay in the moment, mindful of Spirit, of nature, of love, and of the spark of the Divine within me, I am grateful, joyful and peaceful. If I think about how I want everything to turn out, I feel anxious. For me, the power is in the moment. When I'm fully in the moment, it's as if the moment expands and I am filled with a state of Grace.

When we stay in the moment, we know that everything is fine, regardless of the future. By this I mean that everything is fine on the soul level. The dying woman knew that everything was fine, because whether she lived or died, her soul was fine.

When we are in the truth of the moment -- that we are an individual manifestation of Spirit, that we are the God/Goddess yin/yang energy in form, that our soul is privileged to journey in form -- we will feel the bliss of the moment. Each moment we are in this state is a moment of enlightenment.

The paradox is that it is when we are in this state of true connection with ourselves and Spirit that we have the most opportunity to manifest our dreams. We are in the flow, in the zone, and we find ourselves in the right place at the right time. Our frequency is high and we are tapping into the power that is available to us. When we focus on the past and future and create the anxiety that goes with this, our frequency lowers and we are out of the flow. While staying in the moment does not give us control over the future, it gives us opportunities in the moment to make the choices that are in the highest good of our soul.

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