03/18/2010 05:12 am ET Updated Nov 17, 2011

Just Listen - Stuff Your Turkey With Giving Thanks

Why settle for giving a "thank you" when you can give a POWER THANK YOU*?

Make giving thanks the center piece of your Thanksgiving by having each person give a Power Thank You. It has 3 parts:

Part 1: Thank someone for something specific that they did for you (it can also be something they refrained from doing that would have hurt you).

Part 2: Acknowledge the effort it took for them to do it (by saying something like: "I know you didn't have to do ---" or "I know you went out of your way to do ---").

Part 3: State the difference it personally made to you.

For example:

1. I want to thank the Living section of the Huffington Post for accepting and featuring many of my blogs.

2. I know how many blogs you receive and how you sort through them so that you offer the best information to you loyal readers and that it takes effort to select the ones you choose to use and to feature.

3. The fact that you have accepted and featured so many of my blogs helps me to feel that I have "listened" accurately to your readers and am being of service to them. Listening well and being of service are very important to me..

BTW "Giving thanks can make you healthier, happier" according to a USA Today article by Kim Painter.

One of the reasons for that is that you can't be angry and thankful at the same time.

Anger is a reaction to feeling something is missing, something has gone wrong and you are wounded. Anger comes from a need to retaliate or out of fear of something or someone attacking/hurting you again to attack them to keep them from doing it (think wounded animal and war in Iraq after 9/11).

Thankfulness comes from a feeling of wholeness, that nothing is missing, that there is no one you need to retaliate against. In fact, if you are not a dyed-in-the-wool taker, thankfulness crosses over into wanting to show gratitude by giving to others.

I'd love to hear from you if you try a Power Thank You for Thanksgiving.

Warm regards and thanks to you all,


* adapted from "Chapter 23: The Power Thank You and Power Apology," "Just Listen" Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone (AMACOM, $24.95)