A Mom's World Without a Man

When you're a single mother, the stress doubles. However, so does her strength as she forgets her fears and forges ahead to find the best way to have a child.
This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email.

Long gone are the days for many when love and marriage were easily a dream come true. Now many people lead very busy lives and therefore work can take precedence over a love relationship as well as other important life factors. This explains why it seems to be difficult for a woman to pair up with a man to marry and raise a family.

Many women have worked hard to reach their present professional level. When you have been married to your job and then the quest for a family begins, you can't expect it to happen instantly. Years can go by as you only meet partners who do not work out for one reason or another -- he lives 20 states away; he's separated, but still married; he has children and cannot support a new family; and the list goes on.

So what is a woman to do? This is what women I know have done. They decided to cut to the chase and stop wasting their own valuable time. After thinking long and hard, they start their quest to become a single parent. Regardless of how difficult it can be for one person to raise children, a strong woman knows that she can do it and she does!

When you're a single mother, the stress doubles. However, so does her strength as she forgets her fears and forges ahead to find the best way to have a child. She finds the method that works for her to have a child by getting pregnant via artificial insemination, IVF, surrogacy or other personal ways of her choosing. She also has the option to adopt and raise the child, herself. The women that I've met who have raised children on their own are very happy that they decided to start a family regardless of being a single parent. When a woman chooses to be happy, she conducts life in a way where happiness is the focus in everything she does. That makes raising a family easier. Here are some things to keep in mind as you begin the next part of your life as a single parent.

Ask For Help

Don't hesitate to ask for help. People who love you are ready to offer their time. Many single moms have a family member move in to assist them with the transition. If your family does not live close, you have to do some research to find someone to help you with your child. Day care has been an important option for single moms who have to go back to work and there are a lot of great ones.

Expose Your Child to Other Families

A woman who decides to become a single parent needs to expose her children from an early age socially to other families that also have one parent. It helps the child to feel more accepting of their family style when they see other families are the same. When your child eventually asks about their dad, you should let them know that all families are different. And even though their family does not have a dad, they may have uncles, a granddad and male family friends that are close and can be trusted with their children. They, too, become father figures.

Mommy Needs Care Too

You have to be able to create a schedule so you divide your hours properly and still have time for yourself. Many single parents can burn out and crash. There is a lot to do as a single parent, but you need to take care of yourself as well. Get on a sleep schedule that can work for you because rest is the most important thing. Another element is to eat healthy. This will give you energy to help you to face your daily responsibilities.

Live and Love Again

Some women have entered parenthood as a single mom and later met someone to settle down with. The couple ended up parenting together. While you think you might be too busy to meet someone with work and a child, anything can happen. So remain positive that love with somebody new can be a part of your life.

Mapping Out Your Future

Being a single parent, you are doing the work of two people. As a parent, this is when all of your energy and resources go into your parenting life. This is a time when other parts of your life could fall away because it becomes all about the child. What you want to do is start creating and manifesting what your next chapter will look like. Just remind yourself to journal or make notes of your thoughts. As you see them on paper, it will be easier for you to map out your ideal goals before you begin to take your action steps.

Popular in the Community

Close

What's Hot