10/24/2014 07:02 pm ET Updated Dec 24, 2014

What Would You Love?

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Two Signals of Your Emerging Dream

I have worked with people all over the world, helping them understand and apply the technology of dream-building. Understanding this technology helps people live a life they absolutely love living. Because of my work as a speaker and teacher in this area, people often come to me with questions they are having difficulty answering for themselves. One question I hear frequently is, "Mary, what if I don't have a dream?"

Let's start with the understanding that there is a difference between not having a dream and not being sure what your dream is. Many people who think they do not have a dream actually have one but are not sure how to define it or where to start looking for it. So, walk with me for a moment as I guide you to connecting with the dream that is meant to emerge in your life right now.

Life is always seeking an ever-fuller expression and expansion through you. You are the embodiment of a life meant to be lived. I love this quote from the Talmud that says, "Every blade of grass has an angel leaning over it whispering, 'Grow, grow, grow.'" That same energy is seeking expansion and expression through you!

I know something about you without even having met you: You have a problem. How do I know you have a problem? Because you're breathing! Problems arise in our everyday lives. It's how we confront, accept or avoid these problems that creates our reality. Dreams unfulfilled are the manifestation of the problems we face.

Let me put it another way: Your problems come with two accompanying signals that a dream is trying to emerge in your life. The signals are your longing and your discontent.

I advise anyone studying with me to start paying attention to whatever it is you're paying attention to, because what you focus on and the emotional state that focus creates in you is what you are attracting in your life.

For instance, if you want a romantic relationship in your life, but every time you go to the grocery store you are thinking to yourself, "Here I am, alone again, shopping for one, always shopping for one"; and you hang your head and walk around that way, your potential partner isn't going to see you. By thinking, focusing on, being the affirmation of aloneness you remain in that vibration and cannot attract the relationship of your dreams. But if you currently feel that way, I have good news for you. The discontent of not having a partner is actually great information! The longing for a partner is great information!

When your longing and your discontent appear, that is the time to say to yourself, "Look! Here is a dream that is trying to emerge in my life." Once you have identified your discontent, state what you would love. "I would love a partner. I would love to spend six weeks in Europe. I would love a beautiful home in the mountains where I can plant a vineyard."

What would you love?

Informed by your longing and discontent, you know a dream is trying to emerge in your life. By asking the question, "What would I love?" we begin to shift our attention to that dream instead of our circumstances. This is the fun part! Let your imagination take you to your dream! Spend some time envisioning the details of your dream. What does it look, sound, feel, smell and taste like?

How does it make you feel?

Now go through your day thinking about how much you love your dream. Maybe there is a spring in your step now that your dream lives for you. Going back to our grocery store story, consider how great it will be that you love to cook together as you pick up ingredients for your meal and how much you enjoy taking your dog to run in the park. Remember that spring in your step? Your potential partner is going to see that and walk right into your life. That is how it works.

Fill in the images of your dream with what you would love, and you begin to consciously steer yourself in the direction of inviting your dream to come into being.

You see, everything you think about is always coming into being. If you look around at the results you have, and you do not like them, then the place to make the change is actually in your consciousness, not your circumstances. This is because your consciousness is what creates your circumstances.

When you start with the awareness that longing and discontent in your life are actually a tool to assist you in getting clear on what you would love, then you are in the driver's seat. It's an easy step to discover what dream is trying to emerge by means of you and the life you are living.

So let me ask you, "What would you love?"