THE BLOG
09/05/2014 02:21 pm ET Updated Feb 02, 2016

Sam Am I?

I think any NFL sports team would be nuts to throw Michael Sam away. But the Rams did a few days after ESPN's shit reportage. Now Sam is a Cowboy -- tick, tick, tick. He's under a fuck-load of pressure. So why don't you back the fuck up NFL; then take a solid look at your last call. "As for you ESPN -- Go eat a dick!"

This I say as a writer, but you'll never hear those kinds of things from Michael Sam, and you know why? He's a better man. He's even a better man than you at many things, NFL and ESPN. Not just football but compassion, class, dedication, discretion, respect, devotion, faith, integrity and common human decency.

So, I'll tell it like it is, and let Michael shower up in peace -- you fuck heads at ESPN need to get the fuck out of his shower and mine. You need to stay the fuck out of his bed and every man's lair. You need to back your fucking shit up NFL and ESPN. Not only clock it with an apology, you both need a full out campaign to enter the 21st Century.

Male sexuality is complex. It does not need to be flogged on television, nor does a non-profit NFL have any right to deny it's very existence within the league, or allow a player to be discriminated against because of it, so the NFL must take a stand against ESPN. AND -- I should be allowed to levy a financial fucking fag fine against both your gay asses, because a lot of gay men have played on your pigskin fields, the green diamonds, the golf courses, ice skates both figure AND hockey -- to name but a few contributions to the history of sports in America just do the math yourself.

NFL?!!! Why do you persist in this complicity; traumatizing an already frail discourse on men's sexual health, denying gay men have any existence -- put another way a good man's job has been compromised and you continue to do nothing. And NFL, unlike other modern or traditional clubs, leagues got hep to the fact there were gays among us a while ago. Take the UFC for instance, baseball and basketball, no biggie.

Sports teams and locker rooms and men of all sizes and shapes know that homosexuality exists and it exists primarily in masculine culture: the military, professional sports, labor to name a few iconic examples -- it exists everywhere, and as a minority opinion, a beautiful genetic mutation that I too possess, I would think it could be protected as it is elsewhere in America. Homosexuality is going on, in and out of the showers, that's just what goes down when you get men together, they love each other -- platonically and sometimes sexually. It's part of the male equation. So get the fuck used to it. Because you and I would get along much better if you did. And I wouldn't have to levy the rainbow tax.

NFL and ESPN, all men -- face fucking facts, you have seen the body of another naked man. Did it arose you? Did it not? You're comfortable there? Good. You've still probably taken a shower with a man who checked out your dick. And another who checked out your ass. Even if they did or didn't want to have sex with you, they still checked you out. Get the fuck used to it because there it is.

And another thing -- you and I both know that at some time in your life all men checked out another naked man, compared himself to you, and you had an emotional and a physical reaction. This is not shameful behavior, this is the nature of mankind, it is how men grow up and define themselves. Can I have a relationship with other men that does, or does not, involve sex, and still allow it to be a safe and an intimate relationship?

Men -- do you know how important the answer to that question is for your emotional and physical health in this life? Can or can't you love and trust another man, work with him, side by side, no matter what?

ESPN -- sends in a reporter to talk about player reactions to Michael Sam taking a shower with other men. OK, when did that become fair and balanced sport's reporting? Did you ask Michael Sam what he thought about taking a shower with a straight dude? Did you ask anyone what they might think about having that held against them? By challenging a working man who has no record of accosting other men in the shower -- ESPN, you are impinging his character and implying he is incapable of a mutually consenting partner after a long day at work, but would rather be a threat to other men because of his sexual preference -- that is what you did to Michael Sam and all gay viewers.

"It's great -- thanks. Sex with straight men." Is that what you expected?

Michael Sam probably wouldn't have used the F bomb, but Fuck You ESPN. I am spray painting it in black across my HDTV with your logo beneath. Heterofascist men who think their shit is on fire and never accept they get checked out ARE checked out -- checked out of fucking reality. All men check each other out, it's human nature, allowable and not something to become traumatized over and man up against. Save your energy drink.

Fuck you ESPN for focusing your naughty shower cam on the reactions of other players to one man having to clean himself up after a days work, shaming the male body and mind. Your lack of professional judgement and the effect it might have on a man's life and career is staggering and should be held to a higher standard than a simple apology.

Men are fucked up. Not just gay men, straight men you're fucked up. You're so fucked up if you think every time you show your fucking cock to the world I want to bite it. Eat shit. Go blow your foot. Ever wonder why half your brain is consumed with hate for gays, and why you can't even have like many straight men I meet a half-way decent relationship with another man that is intimate without being sexual. Do you ever wonder why you feel so frightened starting up a friendly conversation with your fellow man?

You are fucking scared shitless you or he might be gay, or perceive you as gay, and what you perceive as worse -- when he is gay, you forgo any intimacy with men that could possibly be of great benefit to you and your personal life because of that sexual misconception. It is the fear you have around not only homosexuality but your own heterosexuality -- any sexuality or intimacy really, it is the fear of love, either sexual or non, with other men that scares us. Cue fucking ESPN and the NFL, who are currently reenforcing the worst male sexual stereotypes and adding compound fractures onto men's health both physical and mental.

Here is my fine -- both organizations: $20 million dollars. We'll set up a board in Sam's honor, no salaries, all the money goes to support anti-discrimination and anti-bullying campaigns. NFL sponsors, and league players can safely sign on, as they wish, volunteer spokesmen and supporters for the sexual, emotional, physical and psychological health and safety of all men. Both organizations issue full page ads with a pledge to end discrimination based on sexual orientation. Make that a non-profit AND non-negotiable pledge NFL; no discrimination! Any business entity such as ESPN who violates or transgresses that gets the long punt.

Am I Sam? No I am certainly not -- not even half as classy. I'm just another gay man who wants to enjoy the game without having his shit laid out to dry. One who would rather not let another man be put out on Front Street for being gay while watching a game I'm suppose to enjoy. NFL -- I would appreciate it very much, if you would get your ass off the couch and issue a much needed end to the verdict of public opinion. Drop the flag on hating fags; your league is starting to show signs of for profit status in the worst way. Those abject apologies issued afterwards -- especially like the one issued by ESPN -- do not bend an end to bias, bigotry and discrimination. Money talks, and bullshit walks -- it can sprint as far as I'm concerned down every fucking field in the nation. So both teams, NFL and ESPN, pony up and pledge your support to end it -- no bullying, no homophobia, no discrimination, game on players safe when they are ready to come out or stay in.

Leave it out of the stadium by leaving it out of the league -- tell us all men are welcome to play football. And men, remind yourselves that just because sexual orientation varies does not mean one's morality, respect for other men and women, or allegiance to the one you love makes work on the field any different. Straight or gay or anywhere in between, we are all checking each other out in the shower from time to time, and it's not the end of the world. What you have done, ESPN, is make it so for Michael Sam in the short term, and reenforce a poor stereotype of an African-American, gay player. What you have done NFL is remain compliant by your silence, and exacerbated an already difficult situation for your players both past and present. You both continue to inflict trauma by your lack of real compassion for staunch social justice on the field.

Job discrimination is un-American. So change up now, both of you -- and pay my rainbow tax for your egregious behavior. Your past includes a horrible lack of leadership to end discrimination not only in football but all professional sports. By reversing course, NFL and ESPN, you would improve men's lives -- not just take them for granted or sell them out like a stadium with no lights. Michael Sam is doing something no man has ever done before in professional football because it was not and remains to be seen if it can be a safe career. Though many men tried in NFL past, no man has been able to simply exist in the league as a homosexual.

Michael Sam is trying to show all men that male sexuality and male integrity are not mutually exclusive. They are, they can be, one in the very same thing. He is a leader for all men in a day and age when they are most needed. A professional gay man working within a physically difficult masculine culture, but what is most troubling is that many men are so naive to the fact that we have been here, working beside you, for all of human history.

Understand this message: All men should challenge their assumptions, we need to take better care of our sexual selves, and learn to incorporate the emotional, physical, and psychological impact of our relationship to our own bodies, our sexuality, and the fluidity and health of both. Men need to stop punishing themselves in many ways, and we need to stop embodying and projecting this onto Michael Sam. We pick and choose unwisely when we do it collectively.

But a unified front against discrimination, a return to "All men are created equal.", that would be a good place to start.