01/28/2009 02:16 pm ET Updated May 25, 2011

The Clinton Campaign's Latest Anti-Obama Press Release

The Audacity of Lies: Obama Hiding Secret of Heritage

Barack Obama claims he's a proponent for women's rights. His website says, "He has been a consistent champion of reproductive choice." But few have bothered to ask why Obama cares about reproductive rights. After all, he isn't a woman...right?

"When Barack Obama says he is a man, he is contradicting hard facts," says Milton White, a Clinton spokesperson. Consider this: Where women possess two "X" chromosomes, Mr. Obama has one "X" and one "Y". His "X" chromosome denote that half of his entire genetic make-up came from a woman. That he is, in short, half-female.

Rather than being proud of his heritage, Senator Obama has hidden his half-woman life by claiming to be a man. He married a woman, fathered two children, and even brazenly removed his shirt in public while vacationing in Hawaii, which is illegal for women to do. Since Barack Obama is a half-woman, does this mean he committed a half-crime? Yes.

But Mr. Obama's denial of his half-woman life isn't where his connection to the female reproductive system ends. Barack Obama actually lived inside a woman for nine whole months. He claims not to remember the time, just like he claimed he didn't want to run for president when he was in kindergarten. But a friend of Mr. Obama's mother recently confirmed that "Yes, Barack was inside of his mother, Ann, for the better part of a year."

While Mr. Obama may be too embarrassed to admit these connections, Hillary Clinton is proud of both her womanhood and her time in the womb. Throughout the course of her campaign, Clinton has made a concerted effort to show her femininity by crying, sharing brief physical contact with her husband at carefully calculated moments, and occasionally wearing low-cut shirts. When was the last time we saw Mr. Obama in a flattering scoop neck blouse? Never.

As for her time in the uterus, Clinton says, "Throughout the days of unrelenting darkness, throughout the nights when I would kick and kick, hoping that someone would help me, I never gave up. I drew on the skills I had, and during that dark time, I brought myself all the way from egg to zygote to child. That is the kind of experience that our next president needs to have, and I have that experience."