10/16/2013 05:14 pm ET Updated Jan 23, 2014

The Schlub Effect

Definition of Schlub: a talentless, unattractive, or boorish person.

Not a very nice description of anyone right? Unfortunately ladies, as we all know all too well, we are surrounded by them. This is what happens to middle aged men who do not take care of themselves emotionally, physical or spiritually. They turn into schlubs.

They usually start their days off by waking up with some sort of complaint about life. Grab yesterday's clothing, maybe brush their teeth. Forget about doing their hair with any kind of instrument. They have their hands with some saliva to take place of a brush and some styling gel. They go to the bathroom and then spend five minutes describing the amazing crap they took. Off to the kitchen they go for some coffee and something sugary and unhealthy. Maybe one more for the road and their off. Thank goodness!

Now, let's talk about their days at work. Unproductive, doing the bare minimum and watching the clock for their next meal to happen. Yay, lunch time and all is well with the world. They stuff themselves silly and back to work feeling full, lethargic and grumpy. Time to go home. The traffic is always horrendous and they need to go to the bathroom. They make it home and grumble about how hard their day was without once asking about yours. You cross your fingers and hope he stays out of your way the rest of the night.

Unfortunately, these men are a big percentage of the American male. Over worked, over fed and miserable. What they do expect from their partners is the exact opposite.

They need to see the women in their lives look like goddesses and cater to them like hired help. They need to be trim, fit and pretty. The only problem is that these men freak out if they spend a penny doing it. After women take care of their kids, work a full day at their jobs, take care of the kids again which includes, feeding, homework and bedtime, off she goes to working out, or doing whatever it is she does to look good. All the while this burning resentment is going on inside of her. What does she do with it? She internalizes it and then feels sick, gets headaches, upset stomachs and sleepless nights. She has rage and feels helpless and trapped. Then she wakes up and goes through this all over again.

Wake up men! You wonder why your wife is not interested in you. You always complain that she's bitchy or not happy. Time to take stock and examine yourself. We can't change them if they aren't willing. So the best thing to do is change yourself. If you decide to stay in this relationship, then stop complaining. If you need to move on, then get cracking. The longer you stay there the more miserable, depressed and unmotivated you will become. Only you can make these choices. No woman deserves a schlub.