05/09/2015 10:47 am ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

Autism and Mothers Day: Fantasy vs. Reality

1. Breakfast in bed
The pitter patter of little feet and giggles, the bedroom door quietly opening to surprise you with breakfast in bed. No way would this happen plus that would be extremely predictable. We prefer to get jolted out of bed by what sounds like a herd of elephants stimming and hooting all the way up the stairs. Loud repeated pounding on the bedroom door, Dad yelling "Knock it off, it's a surprise!" Some might prefer the first way, but that is not the way we roll; nothing says Happy Mothers day like a heart attack first thing in the morning.

2. Going to Brunch
Some moms might like a fancy jazz brunch with flowers, mimosas, an omelet bar and a crepe station. Sounds fantastic but not realistic and I am not sure I even like Jazz. Our kids can't handle all that noise, strange people, food smells, and waiting in line for food that they likely will refuse to eat. We would much rather drink mimosas at home in our pajamas the way God intended.

3. Rest and Relaxation
An entire day just for mom -- no cooking, cleaning, or laundry, Dad, and the kids take over the duties household for the day. Who could ask for more than a good book or a movie in bed, stress-free time alone. I think we can all agree this would be wonderful, but it is pure fiction at least for us. I cannot think of anything less relaxing. Scenario A. You are lying bed then you realize it is too quiet. What are they doing? Something must be wrong are they all dead or asleep? Those are the only two reasonable explanations you can think as to why it is so quiet. Scenario B. You are lying in bed listening to what sounds like muffled crying or is it laughing? What just broke and why do I hear water running? How can anyone be expected to relax under these conditions?

4. Family Praise and Adoration
Moms love attention, compliments, being the center of attention for the day. Listening to things such as "You look stunning in sweats," "Mom I love everything you cook," or "We appreciate all your hard work." In reality, this does not happen at least not here. I sold my pedestal on Etsy years ago, my kid only eats like five things and has never complimented my cooking. We prefer to keep it real, and as down to earth as possible the constant compliments and praise would go straight to our heads anyway, so just treat us like it's Monday.

5. Gifts
Lastly the gifts some moms want flowers, jewelry, or a day at the spa. We are realists, a spa day who has time for that. Jewelry, not our style it would just clash with yoga pants unless of course it's a macaroni necklace those are timeless. Flowers no thanks just one more thing I get to take care of. Give me a custom made Minecraft or Lego creation any day of the week now that is real love.

All joking aside Happy Mother's Day to all the mom out there. We all feel overwhelmed, under-appreciated and in over our heads at times. We all get honored and celebrated differently or sometimes not at all. Just remember this Sunday whether you are having a fancy brunch, relaxing in bed or you're a single mom at home with your kids, you are loved and appreciated. The little ones in your life feel it even if they don't yet have the words to say it.