08/05/2013 05:31 pm ET Updated Oct 05, 2013

Is It Time to Get Serious About Your Personal Sanctuary?

I had the best time hiking Torrey Pines State Reserve yesterday and in the midst of all that natural beauty and calming space a topic came up. My single mom friend and I began discussing the importance of making our homes sanctuaries.

Making personal space a sanctuary when it comes to creating a relaxing, self-loving environment for us and our kids is so important. But what about when it comes to dating? That to me is when creating a sanctuary becomes more important than ever.

Our homes are a place of safety for us and our children. When we bring in different people (whose energy and agendas may or may not be in line with ours), when we create expectations and forge bonds, we are setting ourselves and our kids up for disappointment if we allow bonds to form too quickly or do so without careful thought.

I take it even a step further by not having my mail delivered to my home, ever. I choose to get my mail elsewhere. When I sit somewhere and open my mail it is away from home, so that if there is anything that may cause me stress, like bills, I am dealing with it all there and not brining it into my personal sanctuary.

Back in the days before computers, people went to work and came home, leaving all things related to their job back at the office. Now is it front and center in our sanctuary all the time. TV, computers and video games all bring a different energy into the space and I am as careful as I can be, as sensitive as possible, to that disrupting the entire way I want my sanctuary to feel.

Creating a space that supports love, warmth, security, peace, joy and caring is a big part of living a resilient life. Are you treating your home like a personal sanctuary? Are you taking it seriously? If not, maybe it is time you change that.

Michelle Renee is an author, speaker with The Parsons Company, and the creator of Extreme Resiliency. Follow Extreme Resiliency on Facebook.

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