There is a famous story that goes like this:
John Kavanaugh went to Calcutta to find out how he was to spend the rest of his life. When he met Mother Teresa, he asked her to pray for him. "What do you want me to pray for?" she replied. He then uttered the request he had carried thousands of miles: "Clarity. Pray that I have clarity."
John was willing to do anything for God, he just wanted to know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, what that was.
"No," Mother Teresa answered, "I will not do that." When he asked her why, she said, "Clarity is the last thing you are clinging to and must let go of." John replied, "But you always have clarity and that is all that I desire!" Mother Teresa laughed and said: "I have never had clarity; what I have always had is trust. So I will pray that you trust God."
At first it sounds noble, doesn't it? We are very used to praising that type of "surrender" in the Church.
Before you praise his level of surrender or before you start wishing you were as committed as him, consider the words of Jesus to a man very similar to Mr. John Kavanaugh.
Matthew 8:19-20: And a scribe came up and said to Jesus, "Teacher, I will follow you wherever you go."
Perfect! He is willing to go wherever for Jesus.
Jesus said to him, "Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay his head."
This is so important! Surrender means laying down everything -- including clarity -- and trusting God to lead you.
In the bible, I don't think anyone understood this more than Abraham.
God called Abraham to be a sojourner without a permanent home here on earth. The call from Jesus was no different in the New Testament and it's no different for you today. God has called you to a life of uncertainty and dependence on Him. Abraham didn't know then that he might be slaying his only son Isaac. He didn't know then about the famines he'd experience. He didn't know about the years of waiting on the Lord for the promise. He didn't know any of that then.
He surrendered everything -- including the clarity he could have had in this life -- and gained a crown of righteousness in another country.
That's the point! Following the world gives you clarity in this life. Following Jesus gives you uncertainty in this life.
And so you're facing an extreme, life-altering, eternity-paving choice at this very moment. You can have clarity for your life. It's a decision that the scribe made after talking to Jesus there in Matthew. The broad road is full of church-goers who will surrender everything to the Lord... except for their clarity in this life.
Or, you can live like Abraham. You can lift that knife to slay your only son - the promise - even though you cannot see any other way for God to come through. The narrow road is a road where each step is trust - not clarity! But, every step you're getting closer and closer to Jesus. And He's enough.