05/27/2016 02:55 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

What's Your Leadership Style? 3 Questions to Ask


Do you want to be an inspiring leader, but are afraid of becoming an obnoxious boss?

Many of the professional women I speak with tell me they feel they are ready to become better leaders, but they don't know where to start.

They struggle with an underlying fear of being labeled inflexible, difficult ... or worse.

In their minds, leaders are aggressive, arrogant bully-types, and not the kind of people they aspire to be.

No wonder they're apprehensive about moving to the next level and leading.

"There is a difference between being a leader and being a boss. Both are based on authority. A boss demands blind obedience; a leader earns his authority through understanding and trust." - Klaus Balkenhol

"Leadership is not about titles, positions, or flowcharts. It is about one life influencing another." - John C. Maxwell

In other words, a boss can and should be a leader, however, a leader does not have to be a boss.

I believe leadership begins when you become a leader in your own life.

"Leadership is the capacity to translate vision into reality." - Warren Bennis

The key to living a leadership lifestyle is feeling empowered to do things in your own way. But to do that, you must stop believing all leaders behave the same way.

First and foremost, you must be true to yourself. Mimicking someone else's style will only take you so far. Faking it to get ahead is simply not sustainable. Eventually, your false exterior will crack and you'll find yourself overwhelmed, burned out and exhausted.

Here are 3 guiding questions to help you explore your unique leadership lifestyle:

1. How would your ideal day look?

Describe in detail how your ideal day would unfold. Act as if you have no restrictions on money, your time or your health. You act from a place of knowing you can achieve your goals, effortlessly.

  • How do you want to feel at the end of the day?
  • Who do you want to be?

2. Can you name your core values?

Your core values are the guiding principles that enable you to consistently make the right decisions. Living the leadership lifestyle means you are proactive, you make your own decisions, and you take ownership of your actions.

  • What is most important in your life?
  • What 5 words describe your core values?
  • What rules and standards do you live by?

3. Who are you at your core?

Good leaders embrace their authentic selves, including their shortcomings and rough edges. As you adapt and change, you add layers on top of your core self. This can make it difficult to see the true you.

  • If you were completely true to yourself, how would you show up every day?
  • Can you acknowledge your rough edges, and see them as places to learn and grow?

Living an integrated, purpose-based leadership lifestyle requires you to look deep inside yourself to acknowledge who you are, what you want, and your vision of an ideal life. This is the first step to becoming a leader rather than a boss.

Knowing yourself and your core desires is at the heart of what I coach and teach my one-on-one clients. After they embrace their own version of the leadership lifestyle, they begin to bloom in their careers and personal lives.

Are you ready to dive in and upgrade your career and life? To learn more about my leadership lifestyle coaching, schedule a Clarity Call here.


Nozomi Morgan, MBA, is a certified Executive Coach and the Founder and President of Michiki Morgan Worldwide LLC. Addition to coaching, she speaks and trains on leadership, career, professional development and cross-cultural business communication.

Visit to learn more about Nozomi . There, you can download the free Leadership Discovery Tool. Follow Nozomi on Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, or Google+.