02/24/2015 02:58 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

Why Even Bad Feelings Are Good


As a working therapist, I know that people visit me when they are feeling bad.

It's those uncomfortable feelings and difficult emotions that make them pick up the phone and come in to see me.

Being human, we are capable of experiencing a range of emotions -- both pleasant and unpleasant. It just comes with the territory.

So often, though, we treat our uncomfortable feelings and emotions as if they had no real right to exist, inconveniences to be anesthetized or bludgeoned into extinction.

But emotions aren't really the enemy. They are feedback sent from within, messages sent from our deeper self that tell us how we are doing. As such, there really are no bad feelings -- only comfortable or uncomfortable ones.

When we attempt to deny powerful feelings, we are refusing to listen to the language of our own subconscious; we are trying to silence our own wise inner voice. In so doing, we inevitably begin to build a potential tidal wave of trouble for ourselves.

Each denial may seem to be nothing special, a polite little compromise, a nod to civilization and past conditioning, but add the energy of all these little suppressions, repressions, and denials together, let it accumulate over the course of years, and what we are left with is an angry sea, a tempest of emotional, mental and even physical trouble.

Our troubled feelings are messages asking us to go to the source of that trouble and do something about it. The feeling part of our mind -- the subconscious -- is trying to tell us something important, and try as we might, we cannot ignore and deny our uncomfortable feelings and emotions forever.

It is when we stop our endless running, face our feelings and decide to do something about them that our healing begins.

That great psychologist Carl Jung believed that all neurosis was an attempt to flee from legitimate suffering. When we feel bad, there is always a reason, always a cause, and if we want to feel better then we would be wise to uncover that cause and then do something about it.

As a hypno-psychotherapist, I know that there are drug-free strategies that can take people to the cause of their disturbed emotions and actually do something about them and the distress they provoke.

Even our most difficult emotions are there to help us. They are a call to action that we would be wise to heed.

When we lose our fear of feelings and emotions; when we listen to and act on their message, then our emotions become much more balanced, and flow in a much easier, more comfortable way.

Peter Field is a UK registered psychotherapist and board certified hypnotherapist. His hypnotherapy Birmingham and London clinics provide hypno-psychotherapy services for a wide range of issues. His new book The Chi of Change focuses on the fascinating world of hypnotherapy.